2015 Kaedrin Movie Award Winners!

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The nominations for the 2015 Kaedrin Movie Awards were announced last week. Today, I’ll be announcing the winners of said awards. Next week, I’ll cover less traditional categories in what we like to call the Arbitrary Awards, and not long after that, I’ll post my top 10 of 2015. After that, we’ve got the Oscars (predictions and live-tweeting or something) and then it’s on to 2016. But I digress, let’s get on with the awards:

  • Best Villain/Badass: Immortan Joe, played by Hugh Keays-Byrne in Mad Max: Fury Road. You will ride eternal, shiny and chrome. This was a moderate year for villainy, with only a handful of true standouts. Immortan Joe takes the award and stands tall even amongst the Mad Max legacy villains (though I don’t think he quite takes it from Lord Humungus).

    Immortan Joe

    Kylo Ren is probably the runner-up, but he’s held back by his whiny vulnerability and the fact that he got bested by an untrained and inexperienced hero, which is a shame, because he was initially pretty fantastic (and, truth be told, I imagine him being more menacing in the sequel, so I’m sure we’ll be revisiting this topic then). Also of note, Tom Hardy’s performance in The Revenant put him in the running, but even he couldn’t stand up to Immortan Joe. Krampus might have been a good choice, except that he seemed to rely a little too heavily on his various helpers for the bulk of his work. I think I enjoyed the character of Ultron more than most, but then, the concept of the character is squandered a bit, even if he remains a fun little comic book villain.

  • Best Hero/Badass: Imperator Furiosa, played by Charlize Theron in Mad Max: Fury Road. Despite the title of the film, Charlize Theron owns this movie, and while the Best Hero/Villain awards rarely go to the same movie, they earned it here.

    Imperator Furiosa

    Otherwise, there’s lots of competition, surely an overmatch for the villains (but hey, that’s a good thing, I guess). A few folks who I highlighted more to represent an ensemble than for themselves (i.e. Kurt Russel in The Hateful Eight), and this is something I should probably give its own category for. In terms of runners up, um, I don’t really know, there’s like 5 or 6 folks of roughly equivalent heroic badassery on the list. But Furiosa stands out for sure, so she takes it!

  • Best Comedic Performance: Amy Schumer in Trainwreck. This was a tough category to pick, and truth be told, I’m not totally in love with Trainwreck, but Schumer is great in it, and goes to unexpected places. Runner up goes to Michael Peña in Ant-Man, who totally stole the show, but didn’t quite have enough screen time to take the win. Really, the only one not in that I was able to immediately eliminate was Steve Carell in The Big Short. It’s probably not even that funny of a performance, now that I think about it, but there was something about how exasperated his character is at what’s going on (a feeling mimicked by the audience) that tickled me.
  • Breakthrough Performance: Alicia Vikander in Ex Machina and The Man from U.N.C.L.E.. This was a really tough one, and Daisy Ridley in Star Wars: The Force Awakens was really gunning for the award, but I gave it to Vikander because she had more heavy lifting to do in Ex Machina. I only listed two, but Vikander was also in, like, 500 movies this year, which also helped her case. This was a strong category this year, and I’m looking forward to seeing all of these folks again.
  • Most Visually Stunning: The Revenant. I think the movie is about an hour too long, but that hour is mostly glorious landscape shots, so here we are. This award most often goes to a movie that is showy and indulgent, which The Revenant certainly is.

    The Revenant

    Honorable mentions to Mad Max: Fury Road and The Hateful Eight, which certainly comported themselves well on the visual front (and honestly, had more compelling stories, etc…), though not quite as bombastically as The Revenant.

  • Best Sci-Fi or Horror Film: The Martian. Perhaps a controversial choice. Not sure it’s the best movie on the list, but as Science Fiction? This award simply needs to go to The Martian. You may have noticed that I’m a big fan of written Science Fiction, but if your conception of SF is based on Movies and TV, you’ve probably got a much different conception of the genre. Problem solving, competence, can-do attitudes, genuine cooperation; these things are often seen as jejune and unsophisticated, but they’re the beating heart of SF. Nothing against the angsty, pessimistic dystopias that dominate the genre in film, but I was so happy to see my favorite parts of the genre on screen that I have to give it this award. The category as a whole is unusually strong, actually, and most of the other nominees would comport themselves well in most years. That being said, I hope The Martian ushers in a new era of throwback SF, even if that’s highly unlikely.
  • Best Sequel/Reboot: Mad Max: Fury Road. Another unusually strong set of nominees here, but Mad Max was simply the most astonishing sequel, perhaps partly because I simply couldn’t imagine it being very good at all. Runner up would be Creed, another long-gap sequel to an old, venerated franchise. I gave it a lot of love in the nominations, but I don’t think it’s faring quite as well in the winner’s circle. I will most definitely have to find some Arbitrary Awards to give it, because it was wonderful.
  • Biggest Disappointment: Terminator Genisys. A tough choice, as it’s not like I expected Genisys to be that great, but I didn’t think it would be anywhere near as bad as it was. Maybe I’m more harsh on Terminator sequels because I’m such a huge fan of the original, but I always hold out hope that maybe someone can tell a new story in that universe. Meanwhile, I was super excited for Tomorrowland and it totally did not come close to those expectations. A close call, but I went with Terminator for this “award” because it’s clearly the worse film. A close third would be Jurassic World, a movie that has a few decent moments, but which is ultimately pretty pointless.
  • Best Action Sequences: Mad Max: Fury Road. I mean, the whole movie is an action sequence, and it’s glorious, so it has to win. Honorable mention to Kingsman: The Secret Service for that Church scene alone, Everly for its video-game-esque progression of minions and boss fights, Sicario for the tense border crossing sequence, Creed for that single take fight, and I could probably keep going, but I’ll stop now because none of them really holds a candle to the sustained excellence of Mad Max…
  • Best Plot Twist/Surprise: Predestination. Really happy to be able to throw a spotlight, however small, on this little SF film. Of course, I won’t ruin the surprise, but it’s a doozy. Honorable mention to Focus for actually surprising me a couple of times despite being on guard for it (usually the downfall of a con man movie).
  • Best High Concept Film: It Follows. I don’t think the movie could come up with a good resolution for it, but the pure horror conceit at it’s heart is absolutely brilliant, and it’s used to excellent effect. Until, again, you realize it has no idea what to do with the concept. Runner up goes to Victoria for its whole single-take device. I guess that qualifies as high-concept, right?
  • 2015’s 2014 Movie of the Year: Housebound. I could have sworn I saw more 2014 stuff in 2015, but here we are, and I do love this little film, one of my favorite discoveries of the year. Gets the award for Morgana O’Reilly’s delightfully snarky performance. Also because she uses a cheese grater as a gauntlet. Highly innovative. Definitely worth catching up with this movie.

And there you have it! Stay tuned for the Arbitrary Awards and (eventually) a top 10…

2015 Kaedrin Movie Awards

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Welcome to the 10th annual Kaedrin Movie Awards. Ten years. A decade! Hard to believe we’ve been doing this for so long, but here we are. As of right now, I’ve seen 69 movies that could be considered a 2015 release. More than your typical moviegoer, less than your typical critic, but enough so that able to commence with the whole awards rigmarole. [Previous Installments here: 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014]

Standard disclaimers apply: Must be a 2015 movie (with the caveat that some 2014 movies were not accessible until 2015, an edge case that seems to be more common these days) and I obviously need to have seen the movie (and while I have seen a lot of movies, I don’t pretend to have seen a comprehensive selection). Blah blah, subjectivity, blah blah, personal preference, blah blah, the world would be incredibly boring if we all liked the same things for the same reasons. Enough preamble, let’s roll:

Best Villain/Badass

This was a moderately good year for villainy. Far from the worst year for this sort of thing, but while I didn’t have any trouble populating the list, the true standouts seemed rare.As usual, my picks in this category are limited to individuals, not groups (i.e. no vampires or zombies as a general menace, etc…) or ideas (sorry It Follows).

Best Hero/Badass

This was a stronger year for heroism though. Lots of memorable heroes to choose from, even from obscure or unlikely sources, and they tend to outweigh their villains heavily. Again limited to individuals and not groups

Best Comedic Performance

This category is often difficult to populate because comedy so often comes in the form of an ensemble, but we had a decent enough year, except that I don’t think I saw that many comedies.

Breakthrough Performance

Always an interesting category to populate. Sometimes, it’s not so much about someone’s industry breakthrough, but a more personal breakthrough. This can happen even with established actors. This year, though, it’s more about young up-and-comers, and it’s dominated by a terrifying flood of girl cooties. Or something. The main criteria for this category was if I watched a movie, then immediately looking up the actor/actress on IMDB to see what else they’ve done (or where they came from). A somewhat vague category, but that’s why these awards are fun.

Most Visually Stunning

Sometimes even bad movies can look really great… and we’ve got a pretty interesting mix of stuff this year.

Best Sci-Fi or Horror Film

I like to give a little love to my favorite genres, hence this category. When I started this category, I always had trouble finding good SF movies, so I had to pad out the category with horror. But we’ve seen an astonishing increase in good SF in recent years, mostly micro-budget independent stuff, but this year we’ve even got some big studio releases.

Best Sequel/Reboot

Usually a difficult category to populate, but Hollywood has stepped up their game in recent years, thus making this a more interesting category than ever. Very strong year for this sort of thing.

Biggest Disappointment

A category usually populated by sequels, this year offered a strong showing of original movies… that were disappointing. Naturally, the sequels came out to play as well, and I should also mention that this category is weird in that I actually enjoy some of these movies quite a bit… but my expectations were just too high when I saw them. Related reading: Joe Posnanski’s Plus-Minus Scale (these movies scored especially poor on that scale)

Best Action Sequences

This award isn’t for individual action sequences, but rather an overall estimation of each film, and this has been a very good year for action.

Best Plot Twist/Surprise

Well, I suppose even listing nominees here constitutes something of a spoiler, but it’s a risk we’ll have to take, right?

Best High Concept Film

A nebulous category, to be sure, but a fun one because these are generally interesting movies. Actually not a ton of these this year, but the ones we did have were great.

2015’s 2014 Movie of the Year

There are always movies I miss out on, whether due to availability or laziness, but when I do catch up with them, I’m often taken with them. Sometimes a very difficult category to populate, maybe because I didn’t see much, or didn’t like it, or just plain forgot that I saw it (which, to be fair, probably says something about the movie’s chances). In this case, I think it’s all of the above. I could have sworn I saw more than the below and that I was thinking it would be a good year for this category, but I’m having trouble finding options here…

So it looks like Mad Max: Fury Road is leading the way with 6 nominations, the highest since 2007 (when Grindhouse nabbed 9 nominations). I’m a little surprised to see The Revenant not far behind with 5 nominations (it’s a fine movie, but I’m not as enthusiastic about it as a lot of the other movies in this post). Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, Creed, and Star Wars: The Force Awakens clock in at a respectable 4 nominations apiece, while Ant-Man, The Hateful Eight, It Follows, Kingsman: The Secret Service, and Predestination come in at a solid 3 nominations each. Many others have two or one nomination, with 36 total movies (not including the last category, which would put me at 40). Not too shabby. As usual, you’ll have to wait a week or two to see who wins, followed by the Arbitrary Awards and the traditional top 10, concluding with some Oscars prognostication and live tweeting. Stay tuned!

Update: Steven pointed out the egregious oversight of not including Daisy Ridley in the Breakthrough Performance category. We apologize for the fault in the nominations. Those responsible have been sacked. She has been added. (Steven also mentioned John Boyega, but even though I did not nominate him back in 2011 for Attack the Block, he has been on my radar ever since. So while his Star Wars role is certainly a mainstream breakthrough, he’d already wormed his way into this film nerd’s heart long ago!)

SF Book Review, Part 21: Hugo Prep Edition

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I read a lot of books last year, but I’m way behind in reviewing them, so in an attempt to catch up, here are some thoughts on a few Hugo Award related books. Last year I went out of my way to seek out stuff that would be eligible for the Hugos. This year: not so much. But I’ve read a few things that could qualify, so here goes:

  • Lines of Departure by Marko Kloos – This book was nominated for the Hugo Awards last year, but Marko Kloos withdrew the book due to the whole Puppy kerfluffle (thus clearing the way for the eventual winner, The Three-Body Problem). As a result, Kloos emerged mostly unscathed from the whole affair, and many pledged to purchase and read his book anyway. For my part, I really enjoyed the first book in the series and thought it showed a lot of promise, so I was inclined to check out the sequels anyway. This book starts off with humanity in pretty bad shape. Already suffering from a civil war and overpopulation, a new and relentless alien race (referred to as Lankies) has seemingly targeted human colonies throughout the galaxy. Our intrepid hero, Andrew Grayson, is right in the thick of it. After some disastrous operations, he gets scapegoated and assigned to a tiny, ice-bound colony in the middle of nowhere. Naturally, that situation ends up in mutiny and treason… and then the Lankies show up. I liked this well enough, but it also felt a little like the series was treading water. The first book was a little derivative, but well executed and it set up some interesting dynamics. This one is also well executed and moves the ball forward a bit, but not very far. The Lankies still remain inscrutable, which could wind up being a good thing, but what we do know about them is straightforward and not all that “alien”. Grayson and pals are competent and likable, but there’s some discomfort with the whole treason thing. The military here is presented as incredibly dysfunctional, especially when you move higher up the ladder (the grunts are all pretty honorable folks). Depressing, but certainly a valid extrapolation of current political trends. The book ends with a desperate counterattack against an invading Lanky ship. They use a tactic that’s treated like a breakthrough, but that any reader even remotely familiar with space combat tropes already knew about. So what we’re left with is a reasonably well executed MilSF novel, entertaining, but not mind-blowing.
  • Angles of Attack by Marko Kloos – The third of Kloos’ series sees our intrepid heroes marooned on that tiny, obscure planet that’s been cut off from supplies. Lankies are getting closer and closer to Earth at this point, and human institutions are breaking down. Again, we’ve got some well executed Military SF here, a capable enemy and competent heroes. Kloos is good at action, and the stakes are certainly higher here. Our heroes wind up striking an alliance with former civil war enemies (the Sino-Russians) and defending the Earth from disaster. There’s still no real insight into what’s going on with the Lankies, and this book feels, again, like we’re treading water. I understand there’s a fourth book coming out this year, which I’d hope would move closer to a resolution or at least understanding. I feel like I’m being pretty hard on these books; I’ve enjoyed each of them quite a bit, and I’ll probably end up checking out the next book. There’s a possibility that this will get nominated this year, but I’d rank it as more of a dark horse than a lock. I don’t think I’ll be nominating it, but it’s worth checking out.
  • Penric’s Demon by Lois McMaster Bujold – A novella set in Bujold’s Chalion fantasy universe, this one concerns a young man who accidentally contracts a demon. Demon possession is rarely considered a good thing, but in the Chalion universe, it can be a manageable thing and if you can control it, you will get a fair amount of power. Penric is a likable young chap, and I love the way this story treats the relationship with his demon. I won’t go into too much detail, but this was a fantastic novella, one that doesn’t require any familiarity with the other stories in this universe, and will definitely be on my Hugo ballot. Check this one out, it’s short and very good.
  • Uprooted by Naomi Novik – Agnieszka is a clumsy, homely girl who loves her little village, but the corrupted Wood, filled with monsters and evil presences, has slowly been encroaching on the territory. The Dragon, a magician who is assigned to the area, holds the Wood at bay, but requires an assistant from the village. Each assistant is a young girl taken by the Dragon and serves for 10 years before being freed again, usually moving away from the area afterwords. Agnieszka assumes her best friend, the beautiful and talented Kasia, will be taken, but of course it turns out that Agnieszka is chosen. At first, she seems singularly unsuited to the task, and can’t even learn simple spells. But it turns out that she has a knack for a more intuitive form of magic. Soon, the Wood starts to become emboldened in its attacks, and Agnieszka and the Dragon must find a way to counter the offensive. This is a wonderful little fantasy book. It’s got some flaws. I wasn’t a big fan of the romance and some of the conflict is rooted in profound lack of communication. Some people like that sort of thing, but the Dragon’s initially terse relationship with Agnieszka was frustrating for me, and indeed, a lot of the initial confusion and conflict would have been resolved had he spent a few seconds explaining some things. Similarly, the rigid way all the magicians in this universe treat magic seems unlikely, especially when Agnieszka starts showing them her more intuitive version. Those minor complaints aside, this is a well constructed story, with an ominous and cunning enemy and some interesting allies. Novik manages to cultivate a good sense of dread throughout the story, and when the shit really starts to hit the fan later in the novel, it’s much more effective because of that slow buildup. You could say that the ending is a bit rushed and convenient, but one thing I really love about it is that this feels like epic fantasy, but it’s not 7 books of 800 pages. Novik builds a complex, interesting world here and tells a complete story, and I like it more for that. I will probably be nominating this for next year’s Hugo, and near as I can tell, it’s a frontrunner. Recommended for fans of fantasy!

And that’s all for now. I’m not completely caught up at this point, but I’ll get there someday! In the meantime, the Kaedrin Movie Awards will be kicking off soon enough, so stay tuned!

The Year in Books

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So we have reached the one time of the year in which Astrology suddenly becomes palatable for everyone. As we’ve reached the end of our current calendar’s orbital period, we take stock of where we are and where we’re going. We come down from the holiday season, make resolutions, and promptly get to breaking them. I’m making light of this, but it’s a good thing to do from time to time, and completing another trip round the sun is as good a time as any. I don’t tend to talk about my more personal reflections here, but I do like to look back at the year that was in terms of books I’ve read and movies I’ve seen (movies will get their own, much more elaborate jamboree later in the month). I keep track of my book reading at Goodreads (we should be friends there!), and they have some neato statistical visualization tools which could really use an overhaul, but they’ll have to do and now that I have 6 years of data, it’s more useful than it used to be.

First up, total books read:

Overall Books Read in 2015

So I read 45 books in 2015, about on par with last year, but still not quite reaching the heights of 2012’s 50 books (my record in the current era). Same distortion as last year: I was following along with the Hugo awards this year, so the 45 includes some short fiction (but, I should add, not all of the ones I read, so maybe it’s a wash). Call it cheating if you like, but it actually made up a smaller piece of the pie than last year. We’ll get into this in more detail below, so let’s take a look at page numbers:

Number of Pages Read in 2015

Less than last year’s record breaking number, but far from my worst year and considering the inherent variability of page numbers, let’s just call this on par with last year or 2012. Anecdotal evidence indicates that I tend to read more page numbers when reading shorter books, while longer epics tend to slow me down. This year I had a lot of both. Sure, I had a bunch of novellas and novelettes, but I also read several 800+ page books. Let’s look closer:

2015 Summary

So the shortest book was a Hugo novelette that I was kinda meh about, whilst the honor of longest book went to Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell clocking in at 1006 pages. Runner up appears to be Seveneves at a svelt 880 pages, followed by the most “popular” novel, A Game of Thrones at 835 pages. And I read a lot of other 500-800 page books, leading to a moderate average page count of 306, which is not quite as good as last year’s 322, but better than 2012’s 289. Interestingly, 2013’s average page count was 356, which is the highest of the current era; more evidence that longer books tend to slow me down.

Longest Book and Book Breakdown

And the breakdown remains similar, though simplified this year. No comic books or short stories included, and maybe a slight increase in terms of non-fiction, but still dominated by fiction.

Goodreads also provides a fancy gizmo that graphs publication dates, which now looks like this:

Books Read by Publication Date

The oldest book I read was 1961’s The Stainless Steel Rat, a short little SF con man turned spy novel. Not my favorite, but more interesting than a lot of Hugo related stuff I’ve been reading.

I declare this a good year of reading. I don’t plan any significant changes in my patterns this year, though I’m honestly still on the fence about participation in this year’s Hugo process. My current membership allows me to nominate, and two of my favorite authors released great stuff this year, so I’ll certainly submit a ballot, but I’m just not sure if I want to put up with all the manufactured controversy. Taking a quick look at the Sad Puppies crowdsourcing post, it looks like there will be a John C. Wright novel this year, which is not an exciting proposition. Dude is talented, but his style bounces right off me and while he sometimes has neat ideas, I rarely find them explored well. Plus, Wright is one of the more divisive members of the Puppy cohort, and I don’t want to deal with all that baggage. I guess we’ll have to see how this plays out. In the meantime, I’ll just keep poking at older SF since that seems to scratch the itch I have right now.

2015 Year End Movie Cramming

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The end of each orbital period is usually accompanied by a mountain of best-of-the-year lists and other such reflections. Here at Kaedrin, we watch a lot of movies, but we don’t feel beholden to the timeline and usually end up posting our top 10 list in early/mid February. There are a few reasons for this. As we approach awards season, studios are cramming the final weeks of the year with qualifying runs of prestige pictures. But those movies only play in a handful of theaters and don’t go wider until later in January. Earlier indie titles are just starting to show up on streaming services now. Plus, I’m just a dude who likes movies a lot. I don’t really seek out critic credentials so that I can go to screenings, etc… That being said, January is typically chock-full of movie watching for me, and the grand majority of it is comprised of catching up with movies from the previous year. As of right now, I’ve seen 50 movies that you could consider 2015 releases (are you on Letterboxd? We should be friends.). Interestingly, with the advent of streaming and better availability of obscure movies, the “year of release” is becoming something of a fuzzy line for me. Sure, What We Do in the Shadows came out in 2014… but that was in it’s native country (New Zealand) and the film festival circuit. It wasn’t really available to normal people in the USA until 2015. There are numerous examples of this, so keep that in mind. Anywho, there’s a ton of movies I want to catch up with in the coming weeks, so I figured I should try and nail down some semblance of a list here. As usual, much of this is dependent on availability and timing, and I probably won’t be able to get to all of them. Enough preamble, onto the list:

  • The Hateful Eight – I don’t really need to justify seeing Quentin Tarantino’s latest at all, and if possible, I will try and catch the 70mm roadshow in KOP. Fingers crossed. (In theaters soon)
  • The Revenant – I feel like I’ve been seeing the preview for this forever, and it looks gorgeous. Plus, you know, bear rape (j/k, of course, that was the dumbest controversy ever). (In theaters soon)
  • The Big Short – Is it me, or did this come out of nowhere? It’s got a bizarre pedigree, but has been getting good reviews. I’ll probably take a flier on this one. (In theaters now)
  • Victoria – All I know about this movie is that it’s shot in a single, continuous take. And supposedly no Birdman-esque editing tricks either. Other than that, I’m going in blind, but I’m pretty excited about it. (Amazon streaming and iTunes rental.)
  • The Assassin – I’ve heard good things but know little about this. It may be difficult to get ahold of in time, but it seems interesting enough. (Availability unknown)
  • Room – Another movie I don’t know a lot about, but which is getting lots of buzz in circles I follow. It’s another one I’m not sure I’ll get to due to availability issues, but I am intrigued. (Availability unknown)
  • Kung Fu Killer (aka Kung Fu Jungle) – Rumored to be one of the best action movies of the year, this Hong Kong martial arts flick sounds great. (On DVD/BD/streaming rental)
  • Close Range – Another action flick, this one with less of a good reputation, but which apparently has some great action sequences. Something about a guy protecting his family from a drug cartel. Sounds like it could be fun. (On DVD/BD/streaming rental soon)
  • Joy – I’ve heard many conflicting things about this, and based on my general reaction to David O. Russel movies, I’m betting I’ll think this is a mess. We’ll see if I can squeeze it in, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I don’t get to it. (In theaters now)
  • The Lobster – A frontrunner for Kaedrin’s prestigious Arbitrary Award “Achievement in the Field of Batshit Insanity”. Alas, this may be difficult to track down. (Availability unknown)
  • Cooties – A holdover from this year’s Six Weeks of Halloween, this seems like a fun little horror comedy in which kids at a school become zombies or something. (On DVD/BD/streaming rental)
  • The End of the Tour – This got good reviews and David Foster Wallace is an interesting guy, but I’m not entirely sure how down with this movie I’ll be. Still might give it a shot (on DVD/BD/Streaming rental now)
  • Finders Keepers – Documentary about a guy who finds an amputated leg inside a used grill he bought at an auction. Sold! (DVD)
  • 1971 – Documentary about activists who revealed FBI abuse in 1971 (seems to have many echoes to today’s privacy discussions, etc…) (DVD/BD)
  • Amy – Documentary about Amy Winehouse which has gotten a lot of buzz. (DVD/BD)
  • The Search for General Tso – “Who was General Tso, and why are we eating his chicken? ” These are questions I need answered in documentary form. (Netflix Streaming)
  • The Wolfpack – A documentary about a bunch of kids who grew up never leaving their apartment, and the only thing they know about the outside world are movies. (Netflix streaming)
  • Call Me Lucky – Bobcat Golthwait documentary about an obscure comedian? Sounds good. (Netflix streaming)
  • The Russian Woodpecker – I know very little about this documentary. Something about a Chernobyl survivor and Ukranian war? Has won some awards already… (Amazon streaming rental)
  • Advantageous – One of those low budget SF movies that have peppered the landscape over the past few years. Often interesting, sometimes a bust, I’m probably willing to check this one out. (Netflix streaming)
  • Faults – An interesting premise involving cults and mind control, etc… I’ve heard mixed things, but it’s on Netflix streaming, so I might give it a shot.
  • The Duke of Burgundy – I don’t know what to make of this movie. Everything I’ve heard seems weird, but not so weird that it’d fit the “batshit insanity” realm I usually enjoy. Again, it’s on Netflix streaming, so perhaps I’ll give it a shot.
  • Results – Another Netflix streaming flier, seems kinda like a romantic comedy, or maybe not? I don’t know, we’ll see if I actually get to this…

So there you have it, 20+ movies that I would like to check out, though I probably won’t get to all of them. And I’ll probably watch some other junk instead. Stay tuned for Kaedrin movie awards, coming mid-January!

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

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First, before the spoilers, it’s good. A dramatic improvement over the prequels, if perhaps not quite up to the legendary originals. But what could live up to that sort of hype? I tried my hardest to keep expectations in check, and as a result, found myself greatly enjoying this movie. Star Wars is a lot of fun again, which is something that was sorely lacking in the prequels. My biggest complaint, and it’s a small one, is that it’s too reliant on callbacks to the original trilogy. Everyone’s freaking out about this, so spoilers ahead I guess (I’ll try to be a little vague about it).

In the behind-the-scenes materials for the prequels (of which there is a lot of footage that was generously released), there’s an infamous scene where George Lucas notes that he’s trying to establish parallels between the prequels and the original trilogy, saying “You see the echo of where all is gonna go. It’s like poetry, they rhyme”

Star Wars Poetry from whoispablo on Vimeo.

The problem here is that George Lucas is no Shakespeare, so much of his attempts at this sort of thing come off as hamfisted and clumsy. It doesn’t help that the movies themselves aren’t very good. Now, true, J.J. Abrams isn’t Shakespeare either, but he’s a lot better at this sort of thing. He may have gone to the well a little too often, but the result is that this movie captures a lot of what made the original movies so wonderful (and he did so much better than he did with Star Trek Into Darkness). Ironically, J.J. Abrams has evoked a more Lucas-esque feeling than Lucas managed in the prequels!

So there are lots and lots of callbacks. There’s a bigger, badder Death Star. There’s an assault on that Death Star that evokes the end of the original Star Wars. There’s a dark, masked villain that is strong with the dark side of the force. He has a master that only appears in hologram. He also has a surprising familial relationship with someone. BB-8 is basically R2-D2, but he has that cool rolling propulsion. There’s a cantina scene. Heck, Han Solo (and Chewbacca), General Leia, and Luke Skywalker all show up in varying degrees.

And it works. Again, there might be too many callbacks, but for the most part, they rhyme, like poetry. Where the movie really shines, though, is with the new characters. Rey (played by Daisy Ridley) is utterly fantastic, a scrappy badass and the best addition to the Star Wars universe since the original trilogy. Finn (John Boyega) is heroic and funny, hitting a note of almost childlike wonder. He’s the most openly emotional, but still brave character in the film. Poe Dameron (Oscar Isaac) is charismatic and, well, not quite a rogue, but perhaps dashing. He’s a straight arrow, right out of the serials. What’s more, these three leads play off each other perfectly and the performances are spot on. One could quibble at the speed with which they develop their deep friendships, but this, too, rhymes with the original Star Wars trio of Luke, Leia, and Han. I love these three characters and cannot wait to see where they go next!

For his part, Kylo Ren (Adam Driver) is menacing and terrifying, reminiscent of Darth Vader, but by the end he’s carved out a wholly different identity. One that’s mysterious and vulnerable and intriguing, which softens the impossible comparison between the villains. I’m not quite sure what to make of this character, actually, especially where he ends up, but I’m really excited to see what happens here too. Supreme Leader Snoke (Andy Serkis) is still in the shadows at this point, but he seems suitably menacing. Captain Phasma (Gwendoline Christie) gets almost nothing to do in this film except look really cool in her snazzy chrome armor. My guess is that some of her stuff wound up on the cutting room floor, but that she’ll also get a chance to rebound and establish herself as a name villain in the next film. Nowhere to go but up for her.

Of the returning characters, Han Solo and Chewbacca get the most screentime, perhaps a little too much, but Abrams made it work. Princess (sorry, General) Leia is in the movie just about the right amount, and Luke is only teased a bit (he’ll certainly have more time in the next film). I was wary of this, and in some ways, my worries were justified, but it works out well enough in the end.

All in all, this is an excellent return to form for Star Wars, evoking the best of the original trilogy and yet showing enough potential to carve out its own identity in the following films. This will be crucial because otherwise, this will play out like lesser Star Wars. It’s all well and good for this film to recall the originals so much, but the sequels will need to do their own thing if this is to truly succeed. The good news is that all the pieces are on the board, and they’ve done a good job maneuvering so far. Episode VIII writer/director Rian Johnson is a Kaedrin favorite, and I’m guessing that he’ll shepherd this series on well. He’s also on board to write Episode IX, so I think we’re in good hands (though I have more trepidation about Colin Trevorrow as director).

As a science fiction nerd, I should note that this film is perhaps the least plausible of them all. And that’s actually wonderful! One of the worst, dumbest things Lucas managed in the prequels was the hackneyed attempt to explain the Force scientifically. This movie has no such pretensions, and that’s actually what Star Wars is all about.

If I may go off on a tangent for a moment here, I feel like I should mention the books that I always thought would make a great sequel trilogy. Timothy Zahn’s Thrawn Trilogy is still wonderful and worth checking out, even though it is no longer official canon material. Grand Admiral Thrawn was a wonderful villain, so different from what you might expect, and that worked really well (still holding out hope for a Thrawn cameo in these new movies – come on Rian, just throw a dude with blue skin and a white Admiral’s uniform on screen somewhere). The heroes in that book were still primarily Luke, Leia, and Han, which wouldn’t really be possible in movies these days without recasting, and the new characters weren’t quite as lovable as the new trio we got in this film. Still, the series is worth checking out, and it’s really the only Expanded Universe stuff that I’ve really enjoyed.

Anyway, this movie is great. I will grant that I’m not particularly objective about this whole thing. There’s a lot of nostalgia and love in this series for me, so it’s hard to separate this from that. If I really wanted to, I’m sure I could nitpick a ton of stuff, but I don’t want to. In fact, much of what I could nitpick here is almost equally applicable to the original movie. There’s no sense in that, I just want to revel in this for now. I enjoyed this a lot more than the prequels, and this movie shows a lot of promise for future Star Wars efforts. Only two more years until Episode VIII (though we’ll get a Rogue One movie next year).

SF Book Review, Part 20

2 Comments / Science Fiction / /

I’ve reviewed a bunch of individual books recently, but I am still way behind, so here’s the first of several attempts to catch up. With some reservations, I’ve enjoyed following along with the Hugos the past few years, but I’ve also noticed that I really enjoy delving into the back catalog, and I’m hoping to do more of this in the near future (rather than desperately reading new releases in the hope that they’d be Hugo-worthy – that was not really that productive for me last year). Today, we’ll cover a few books ranging from 10 to 50 or so years old…

  • Little Fuzzy by H. Beam Piper (1962) – Frontier man Jack Holloway comes home from prospecting for sunstones one day to discover a, well, little fuzzy animal hanging around his house. As he gets to know the fuzzy (and his extended family, who also come to stay at “Pappy Jack’s” house), he begins to suspect that these aren’t just cute little animals, but actual sapient beings. Naturally, this spells trouble for the corporation who thinks they own the planet… if the fuzzies are people, that means the company loses out on property rights and the like. First published in 1962, this makes for a great introduction into the SF genre, tackling difficult questions like how to define sapience without getting too esoteric. I don’t think you’d call this a novel of deep characterization, but it’s short and sweet, with excellent pacing and plotting for a thoughtful exploration of consciousness. Plus, the fuzzies feel like the cutest race ever devised. The only flaw is that there are many subsequent works that build on this, and thus it might seem like it’s treading familiar ground… My understanding is that Piper never quite got the respect he deserved in his lifetime, but he’s certainly gained in that respect in recent years (despite some small outdated technological references to things like “tape”, this seems like an example of the classics that would still be relevant to youngsters today). It helps that his works have lapsed into the public domain (this book is available for free on Project Gutenberg) A few years ago, John Scalzi wrote a snappy “reimagining” of this book with his Fuzzy Nation, which has a lot of the same beats, with some added complexity and slightly shifted priorities. It’s also worth checking out, but I wish I had read the original first.
  • Quarantine by Greg Egan (1992) – In Peter F. Hamilton’s Commonwealth Duo, there is a planetary system that is surrounded by an impenetrable barrier, and humans go to investigate. In Quarantine, humans are the ones inside the barrier. At first, this just seems like a way to set up a backdrop of riots and weird religious cults for this neo-noir detective story, but it later becomes clear that Egan had a much deeper reason for use of that trope (one that is a lot more convincing and interesting than Hamilton’s eventual explanation for his take – note also that Egan’s novel predates Hamiltons by many moons). Egan is known for diamond-hard SF, but this is the most approachable novel of his that I’ve read, and he eases you into the mind-blowing stuff with a deft touch. Make no mistake, he gets into true sensawunda territory and this novel contains one of the better explorations of quantum mechanics, observer effects, collapsing wave functions, etc… that I’ve seen in fiction. It’s a well balanced blend of trashy detective tropes and hard SF. The ending might leave some with lingering doubts, but I was so elated by the way Egan tied together the various oddities of setting and plot midway through the book that I didn’t mind at all. Probably my favorite book of the year (blows anything nominated for a Hugo in the past few years out of the water, in my opinion), and highly recommended!
  • Sundiver by David Brin – I only really tackled this because I want to read the second novel in the series, Startide Rising, and wasn’t sure if the first one was necessary or not (it is apparently not, but we’ll see soon enough). In this series, humanity has met up with lots of other alien races, most of which were “Uplifted” by “patron” races. Humanity baffles everyone though, because there doesn’t appear to be a patron race for us, and we’ve made our way to the starts by working through first principles (rather than being taught by someone else). Go Earthican exceptionalism! An expedition into the Sun is mounted to see if the mysterious creatures living there could provide an answer, but various mishaps along the way are cause for hijinks. This novel does a decent job setting up the idea of Uplift and how unbearably patronizing and frustrating the superior alien races can be, but I also found it a bit bloated and overlong. It eventually settles into a better groove later in the story, but it took a little too long to get going. The idea of luminous beings living in the sun is an interesting one that evokes Hal Clement’s first published short story, Proof (which is excellent). This book doesn’t quite approach Clement’s level, but it’s decent enough. I’m hoping for much better things from the sequel, which I hope to get to sometime early next year…
  • Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke – This novel of two magicians, friends and later rivals, bringing magic back to England is an interesting one. Clocking in at over a thousand pages, it might seem forbidding, but it’s not a difficult read at all. I certainly don’t know that it needed to take quite so long, but it never feels like it stalled either, a neat little trick and a testament to the craft Clarke used in writing this book. On the other hand, it does end up feeling more episodic as an overall story (I have not seen the recent BBC series, but I can imagine it working well in that respect), which is not usually my favorite approach. It doesn’t help that our main characters are, while not quite unlikable, they aren’t really the most compelling people either. Mr Norrell is mildly competent, but also a complete turd about it. Jonathan Strange fares better, but is also fairly obtuse as a character. None of this prevents the story from being enjoyable and each “episode” is compelling in its own right. There are a lot of traditional English magic tropes, mischievous fairies and the like, and the novel hangs together well. I can see why it garnered the Hugo award about a decade ago, even if it probably wouldn’t have been my favorite. In the end, I’m really glad I read this, even if it’s also not really my type of book. Often in these situations, I think such an approach is valid but extremely difficult to pull off. I feel like a lot of people give works too much credit for ambition in works that don’t fully realize the ambition. Not so here. Clarke accomplished exactly what she wanted with this, and it’s worth reading because of that.
  • Agent of Change by Sharon Lee and Steve Miller – I read this almost a year ago, so details are getting a little fuzzy (pun intended?) for me, but this is the first in a long-running series by Sharon Lee and Steve Miller. This one covers the meeting of Val Con and Miri Robertson, thrust together by circumstances, but clearly having some form of attraction. It starts out as an action-adventure chase novel of sorts, and our two protagonists spar with each other while fending off throngs of enemy redshirts in an attempt to escape. Things slow down in the middle, and even though we meet a very fun race of alien Turtles, the story never quite resolves itself, ending on a sort of cliffhanger. I generally enjoyed this, though I also think it says something that I have not revisited the series. However, it’s something I could definitely see myself doing in the nearish future. (Every time I start a series like this, I’m hoping to spark some sort of Bujoldesque Vorkosigan Series flame, but so far, I’ve not managed to get there… but then, it took a few books for the Vorkosiverse to really heat up for me too, so there’s that.)

And that’s all for now. Next time around, we’ll tackle some newer releases…

Mr. Dadier’s Juvie-Ready, Tough-As-Nails Blackboard-Bustin’ Back to School Movie Quiz

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A couple months ago, Dennis Cozzalio of the Sergio Leone and the Infield Fly Rule blog posted two of his infamous quizes. Given the Six Weeks of Halloween horror movie marathon, I tackled the horror themed quiz first, but am only now returning to the more standard quiz. Previous installments answering questions from Professor Hubert Farnsworth, David Huxley, Professor Fate, Professor Russell Johnson, Dr. Smith, Professor Peabody, Professor Severus Snape, Professor Ed Avery, Dr. Anton Phibes, Sister Clodagh, Professor Arthur Chipping, Miss Jean Brodie, Professor Larry Gopnick, Professor Dewey Finn, Ms. Elizabeth Halsey, and Professor Abraham Setrakian are also available.

1) Favorite moment from a Coen Brothers movie

This is impossible. After careful consideration, I was able to narrow this down to ten moments.

  • Tracking shot across the bar and over the drunk in Blood Simple.
  • The diaper heist in Raising Arizona
  • “Look into your heart!” from Miller’s Crossing (alternate: anything with Albert Finney)
  • “You know, for kids.” from The Hudsucker Proxy (alternate: Jennifer Jason Leigh’s Hepburn impression)
  • “Oh for Pete’s sake, he’s fleeing the interview! He’s fleeing the interview!” from Fargo (alternate: almost every other Marge Gunderson scene)
  • “Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you want about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.” from The Big Lebowski
  • The scene where the dog is chasing Josh Brolin across the river from No Country for Old Men (alternate: anything with Javier Bardem)
  • The scenes where David Rasche attempts to explain what’s going on to J.K. Simmons from Burn After Reading (alternate: anything with Brad Pitt)
  • The dream sequence fakeout from A Serious Man
  • “…wait a minute… are we trading again?” from True Grit

Also of note, about 10 moments from the Hail, Caesar! trailer.

2) Scratching The Ladykillers, Intolerable Cruelty and The Hudsucker Proxy from consideration, what would now rate as your least-favorite Coen Brothers movie?

First, I resent the inclusion (er, exclusion) of The Hudsucker Proxy in this question. In my opinion, it’s one of the more underrated Coen Brothers movies. Anyway, this might get me disbarred from movie nerddom, but I really didn’t like Inside Llewyn Davis (and my runner up is another fan fave, Barton Fink). Just bounced right off of those movies.

3) Name the most underrated blockbuster of all time

This is hard, because if a film is actually a blockbuster, it’s not really underrated. It was busting blocks, guys! But if you define it as something that people tend to ignore these days (as opposed to when it opened), it gets more manageable. My first thought was the original Rocky, a film that tends to get unfairly slagged because it won the Best Picture Oscar, beating out film nerd favorites like Taxi Driver, Network, and All the President’s Men. It also suffers because most of what people know about Rocky comes from the sequels and not the film itself.

4) Ida Lupino or Sylvia Sidney?

Sylvia Sidney’s had a long career, and I’ve actually seen stuff all throughout, including Beetlejuice (which she is fantastic in!) and Hitchcock’s Sabotage (which is great).

5) Edwards Scissorhands – yes or no?

Yes! It is a bit indicative of the indulgent excess that would sink a lot of Burton’s later work, but here it is still fresh and interesting.

6) The movie you think most bastardizes, misinterprets or does a disservice to the history or historical event it tires to represent

The thing with this is, is that most bastardizations generally make for a better movie. No one gets on The Inglorious Bastards for being inaccurate. Indeed, that’s the whole damn point. So the trick here is to find a movie that is bad, which thus does much more of a disservice to history. As such, a couple that come to mind are Pearl Harbor and The Patriot.

7) Favorite Aardman animation

This is pretty simple: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit.

8) Second-favorite Olivier Assayas movie

I haven’t seen enough Assayas to comment on this one, so here’s my first mulligan.

9) Neville Brand or Mike Mazurki?

I’ve seen more things with Mike Mazurki, but guys, Neville Brand is in Killdozer.

Killdozer

10) Name the movie you would cite to a nonbeliever as the best evidence toward convincing them of the potential greatness of a favorite genre

I always feel like a cheat when I answer The Godfather, because it’s so universal and can be the answer for such a wide variety of questions, but then, here we are. Gangster movies can be trashy, but this is anything but…

11) Name any director and one aspect of his/her style or career, for good or bad, that sets her/him apart from any other director

Too many answers to count here, but the first to come to mind is the weaponized quirk of Wes Anderson.

12) Best car chase

There are so many iconic car chases in film that it’s hard to narrow down, so I think I’ll try to highlight some more obscure personal favorites. I guess The Blues Brothers isn’t that obscure, but it’s an unexpected source for great car chases. Death Proof is notable because it’s a practical effect in an era of CGI. I’ve always enjoyed the care chase in Running Scared. But of course, the answer to this is The Road Warrior (and, I suppose, Mad Max: Fury Road).

13) Favorite moment directed by Robert Aldrich

Opening the box at the end of Kiss Me Deadly…

Kiss Me Deadly

14) The last movie you saw in a theater? On home video?

In the theater, it was Krampus, a delightfully mean-spirited Christmas horror movie that nevertheless generated a few laughs. On streaming, it was Barely Lethal, a weirdly fluffy child assassin goes to high school movie that is more successful than, say, Kick-Ass 2, but that’s not saying much. And on BD, it was Magic Mike XXL, also fluffier than expected, and more episodic than the first film, oddly weightless… but maybe better for that.

15) Jane Greer or Joan Bennett?

Jane Greer because Out of the Past.

16) Second-favorite Paul Verhoeven movie

Total Recall behind favorite RoboCop. “Consider that a divorce!”

17) Your nominee for best/most important political or social documentary you’ve seen

Can it be anything other than The Thin Blue Line? That’s the answer, right? Alright, there’s lots of worthy answers to this, but Errol Morris’ masterwork is my pick.

18) Favorite movie twins

It’s corny and the movie is not that good, but the pairing of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito in Twins is goofy and fun by itself. On a more serious note, the Jeromy Irons twins in Dead Ringers are haunting.

19) Best movie or movie moment about or involving radio

The two that leapt out at me are Samuel L. Jackson’s Radio DJ from Do the Right Thing and the backdrop of “K-Billy’s Super Sounds of the Seventies Weekend” (DJed by the deadpan Steven Wright) from Reservoir Dogs.

20) Eugene Pallette or William Demarest?

I will go with the “Gargantuan-bellied, frog-voiced character actor” Eugene Pallette, a memorable presence for sure.

21) Favorite moment directed by Ken Russell

William Hurt’s psychedelic journeys into the isolation chamberAltered States

22) All-time best movie cat

My first thought ran to Jonesy from Alien, but that’s more indicative of my love for that movie and all its minutiae than because of the cat itself. Similarly, Elliot Gould’s cat in The Long Goodbye is more memorable because of the movie it’s in than because it’s a cat. Finally, I settled on Irena from Cat People, because she’s a giant cat.

23) Your nominee for best movie about teaching and learning, followed by the worst

Real Genius is one of my favorite movies and while the teaching and learning are not direct, I’ve found that the most valuable stuff I learned in college was not in the classroom, so there is that. Plus, all the other answers I could think of had similar flaws.

24) Name an actor/actress currently associated primarily with TV who you’d like to see on the big screen

Krysten Ritter has been in several TV shows and is always a memorable presence, even when she’s not the lead like in Jessica Jones, where she’s still awesome and proves she could totally headline a big screen film.

25) Stanley Baker or David Farrar

I’ve seen a few movies from each filmography, but to be honest, I don’t have a preference, so another mulligan for me.

26) Critic Manny Farber once said of Frank Capra that he was “an old-time movie craftsman, the master of every trick in the bag, and in many ways he is more at home with the medium than any other Hollywood director, but all the details give the impression of a contrived effect.”

What is the Capra movie that best proves or disproves Farber’s assertion? And who else in Hollywood history might just as easily fit his description?

I think the second question betrays the difficulty of the first. There are tons of old-time craftsmen out there, and most film is contrived. That being said, even if It’s a Wonderful Life gives the impression of a contrived effect, we should all strive to be so contrived. The other director who might fit this description? Alfred Hitchcock, naturally.

Adventures in Brewing – Beer #17: Crom Approved Rebrew

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I’ve been woefully neglectful of my homebrewing hobby of late, and recently decided that I must rebrew my recent failed IPA. As you probably do not recall, I made an IPA using copious amounts of my favorite hops and fermented with the infamous Conan yeast (aka Vermont Ale yeast), then dry hopped with more of my favorite hops. It turned out fantastic, but when I kegged it, I was a little careless and allowed too much dry hop sediment into the keg, which clogged the whole thing up. I tried to salvage the beer by transferring to another keg, but that only served to oxidize the whole thing and basically ruin the batch. Which is a terrible shame, because the limited amout of the stuff I got to try when fresh was fantastic and exactly what I was going for. I mean, perhaps not Heady Topper good, but in the same league as the Alchemist, Hill Farmstead, and Tired Hands IPAs that I love so much. Drinking the oxidized remnants was a major disappointment, so I thought I should do something I almost never do and rebrew the original recipe. For posterity, here it is, in all it’s glory:

Beer #16: Crom Approved Double IPA

Full-Batch (5 gallons)

November 28, 2015

12 oz. CaraPils (specialty grain)

8 oz. Crystal 20 (specialty grain)

6 lb. Muntons Extra Light DME

1 lb. Muntons Wheat DME

8 oz. Turbinado Sugar

1 oz. Simcoe (bittering @11.1 AA)

1 oz. Amarillo (flavor)

1 oz. Amarillo (aroma)

1 oz. Citra (aroma)

1 oz. Citra (first addition dry hop)

1 oz. Galaxy (first addition dry hop)

1 oz. Amarillo (second addition dry hop)

1 oz. Citra (second addition dry hop)

GigaYeast GY054 Vermont IPA Yeast

Crom Approved DIPA Ingredients

(Click to embiggen)

This is basically identical to the previous batch. Minor differences include the fact that the Simcoe hops I procured for the bittering addition were slightly lower in alpha acids, but that only resulted in a dip of about 2 IBUs, which I judge to be fine. Indeed, the original goal with this brew was to produce something light and aromatic, not something punishingly bitter. Also, my turbinado sugar addition was slightly different this time due to the fact that I did not have as much in the pantry as I thought, so I had to compensate with a bottle of liquid sugar that I had laying around. I’m pretty sure I got that amount right, but my guess is that there’s slightly less simple sugar added in this batch. Otherwise, the recipe is the same, and the key component is really the Conan yeast.

As with the last batch, the target is an aromatic 8% ABV Double IPA with attenuation in the 75-80% range (maybe slightly less). The specialty grains and wheat addition will provide a nice malt backbone and platform for the hops, while not being too bitter. IBUs are targeted for slightly less than 50, which is a little low for the BJCP guidelines, but I’m shooting for that newfangled juicy, bright, and citrusy IPA rather than the old school dank and bitter IPA.

Original Gravity: 17.1 Bx, or 1.071, which is slightly lower than the target 1.074. This is not at all troubling since the last batch attenuated higher than expected and got us to something higher than 8%. This batch might hit closer to that target, assuming the yeast does its work.

Once again, I have high hopes for this batch, though I am cautiously optimistic. The last batch turned out great, but I will admit the fermentation of this batch started slow. I brewed this on Saturday, and the airlock was essentially inactive until Monday. It’s bubbling away now, which is heartening, but now that I think about it, I did have the yeast in the fridge for a while, and perhaps it was not as viable as the last batch. Fingers crossed! Dry hopping will commence after this weekend, and this sucker will be kegged by 12/13. It will be a nice Christmas present, I think.

Next up? I’m not sure. I was thinking about making a small batch of wild ale (not sure what exactly I’ll patter that after, but I’m looking at a full Brett/bacteria fermentation, rather than my previous mixed fermentation approach), but I’ve also been planning a Scotch Ale (which will, of course, be partially aged on bourbon soaked oak cubes). Only time will tell. Since both of those are time intensive, I might even get to brewing them sooner rather than later, even though they won’t be ready for a few months (at which time, I’m sure the keg will be clear of Crom Approved!) At this point, I’m leaning towards Scotch Ale, because we’re heading into winter, and that boozy, malty style is probably better suited for the season… We shall see. In the meantime, may Crom bless my current batch of beer. I’m sure the god of steel would appreciate such a brew!

(Cross Posted to Kaedrin Beer Blog)

The 2013 Egg Nog Tasting

Leave a Comment / 12 Days of Christmas, Culture / /

Family Holiday traditions are very weird, like how my family does an Egg Nog tasting every Thanksgiving… after dinner. You know, because we’re still hungry and it’s not like Egg Nog is filling at all. In fairness, it was a tradition born by accident. One year, literally everyone thought they were in charge of bringing egg nog, so they brought a couple and we ended up with, like, 15 of them. Since then, we’ve intentionally started doing this. Sometimes, this gets super complicated and involves blind tastings and whatnot, but the last couple years have been pretty informal. Check out some previous recaps: [2013 | 2012 | 2010 | 2008].

The past few years have represented an attempt to find different egg nogs instead of crowning the same two every year (usually local mainstays Wawa or Swiss Farms). This has been fine, but I don’t think any of those actually beats our normal champions. This year, we returned to previous champions, and went for some new things too. Not a crazy number of entries this year though:

2015 Egg Nogs

For posterity, the Egg Nogs pictured here are (from left to right):

  • Swiss Farms Premium Egg Nog
  • Southern Comfort Traditional Egg Nog
  • Wawa Egg Nog
  • Turkey Hill Egg Nog
  • Organic Valley Eggnog
  • International Delight Classic Nog
  • Upstate Farms Premium Egg Nog

So we’ve got three former winners (Swiss Farms, Wawa, Upstate Farms), two standard, middle of the pack entrants (Southern Comfort and Turkey Hill), one I don’t remember having before (but which I apparently have), and one that isn’t even Egg Nog. It’s always amusing how these weirdos try to trick people into drinking this stuff. The giveaway is the use of the word “Nog” without the corresponding “Egg”. That International Delight nog is described as a “Festive Dairy Beverage” whatever that means. You might think this would be a shoe-in for “Worst in Show”, but in reality, it was kinda just like milk with some cinnamon and nutmeg or something. Not bad at all, but not really anything like an egg nog either.

In an odd turn of events, Upstate Farms got under some people’s skin and ended up taking the award for worst egg nog. I didn’t think it was that bad, but it was clearly inferior to the top two, Wawa and Swiss Farms. Someone mentioned that Upstate had a sorta artificial, chemically character to it. I didn’t really get it, but whatever! Swiss Farms took first place, and at this point, remains undefeated. Personally, I still go for Wawa, but that’s just me.

It was fun, as usual, but it was a pretty low key year. Perhaps next year will be the year we finally break down and make our own egg nog. If we can get over our fear of making everyone sick, which seems likely? I feel like it should be simple enough, but we’ll see. Otherwise, I want to find something I can bring to rival Swiss Farms. It’s good, but I don’t know that it’s quite as dominant as its performance the past few years indicates. Until next year!