Disgruntled, Freakish Reflections™ on Happiness

Culture / /

Civilization, Thermodynamics, and 7-Eleven : “Man has never really solved problems so much as exchange one set for another, and what we call progress has simply been a series of shrewd trades that, while never reaching utopia, have at least left us with more desirable issues than the ones before.” Everything has advantages and disadvantages, and we attempt to maximize our advantages while minimizing our disadvantages. But you’ll notice that the disadvantages are never really eliminated. This is all well and good, but why do so few people see it? Its almost like we were raised to be unhappy. We’re shown what we don’t have, we learn that success means winning trophies and money, and that happiness relies on how much stuff we have. We’re expected to live our life in constant, multi-orgasmic bliss, and if we find ourself unhappy, then we’re a failure. Of course, since we don’t live in a Utopia, we will always be unhappy, and thus we will always be seeking new trophies to make us happy. Striving for self-improvement isn’t wrong (its quite honorable), but it won’t necissarily make you happier. All too often, we set our sights on that one mystical thing that, if we could just achieve it, would make us happy. The only problem is, if you can’t be happy now, chances are, you won’t be happy in the future, even if you do achieve your goals.

To paraphrase Dennis Miller, happiness doesn’t always require resolution, but rather an in the moment, carefree acceptance of the fact that the worst day of being alive is better than any day of being dead. Happiness isn’t settling for less, its just not being miserable with what you’ve got. So reach for the stars, but remember, you’re just trading one set of disadvantages with another, and you might not be any happier than you are now…

Way of the Gun

Military / /

Two stories of the pistol by Roninspoon : Utterly compelling stories about the Entry Control Point (more commonly known as a gate) of a patriot missile site in Saudi Arabia. Oddly enough, the conficts described here are not of attacking forces, but rather, internal ones. You see, its a general rule that the gate guard has absolute authority that exceeds the rank of anyone entering his area of responsibility. As usual, there are those who believe that the rules don’t apply to them… (it made me laugh when I saw someone referred to as Tallman). Mr. Spoon has also written a few other military stories (Army stories, Sir! Now with %5 more fiction.), none of which are quite as gripping as his pistol stories, but worthy of a read nonetheless.

Along similar lines is an article critiquing the portrayal of naval operations in Star Trek: The Next Generation. The article is an interesting read, as ST:TNG was way off base on a number of issues, but the portion of the essay that deals with the distinction between line officers and staff officers is fascinating (as most people don’t even know that the distinction exists). In the US Army, Line is infantry, armor, artillery, engineers, and helicopter pilots. Staff is medical, chaplains, quartermaster, transport, intelligence, etc…

If a Second Lieutenant of the infantry (a line officer) gives an order to a surgeon whose rank is full colonel (but nonetheless a staff officer), military courtesy demands that it be phrased as a “request”, but military law firmly establishes that it has the force of an order, and if the surgeon refuses to carry it out, he risks court martial.

This concept is fascinating, and I suppose it applies to Roninspoon’s stories above as well. If, for example, an Army engineer is clearing a minefield, I would assume he has rank over anyone on the field (excluding higher ranking engineers, etc.), just as ‘Spoon had authority over anyone in the dead zone. Of course, ST:TNG got this completely wrong, having Counselor Troi and Dr. Crusher sometimes take command of the ship, when, in fact, any line officer, even an ensign, should be in charge.

Oh, and yeah, sorry about that whole not-updating-for-almost-a-month thing. I think I’ve got some cool stuff on the horizon, so I’ll try and keep on top of it.

Wing Bowl X

Culture / /

Every year, on the Friday before Super Bowl Sunday, Philadelphians gather at the First Union Center for a different type of contest: The Wing Bowl. A tradition that started 9 years ago, the annual Wing Bowl festivities start at the crack of dawn. The audience tailgates in the parking lot while the contestants prepare to eat as many Buffalo wings as possible in a 30-minute time-span. Its become a hallmark of Philly life, with more than 20,000 people showing up for last years event. Only in Philly. Last year’s winner is nicknamed “El Wingador”, and he ate 137 wings in 30 minutes (the highest score of all time was 164 wings!)

Particularly interesting, and more disgusting than eating 100+ wings in 30 minutes, are the Qualifying Stunts performed by wing bowl hopefuls. A good stunt typically includes some sort of gross variety of food, eaten quickly and in mass quantities (strange, as I would think that has little to do with your wing-eating ability). Highlights this year include people eating: Four pounds of tripe in 20 minutes, a pigs head (including snout, cheek and the brain), A dozen hard boiled eggs with shells in 24 minutes, fifty raw clams in fifteen minutes, three pounds of head scrapple and bottle of hot sauce in 20 minutes, and one pound uncooked penne pasta with only 8 ounces of water in 20 minutes. Only in Philly…

1/25/02 – Update: El Wingador does it again. 143 total wings (81 in the first 14 minnutes). Three time champ. I love the nicknames these guys have; there was a 15 year old student in the contest – his nickname is Lord of the Wings…

Why be a Magician?

Arts & Letters / /

alan moore: magician is a site with various odds and ends written by Moore. I found most of it to be interesting. It includes some loose plans for a comic-book Grimoire, an article explaining why he became a magician, and some interesting correspondance with Dave Sim (creator of the long running independant Cerebus comic that I wrote about a while back).

Completely unrelated: Steven Den Best comments on the timely release of the new Ridley Scott directed, Josh Hartnett vehicle, Black Hawk Down.

Very Secret Diaries

Movies / /

Time to lighten things up a bit. This Cassandra person is doing a series of stories about Lord of the Rings characters’ secret diaries. Its hilarious. Homosexual overtones abound. Check them out:

Funny stuff, unless you think the homosexual overtones are heresy or something. Also, check out this Ninja site, its funny too. Mighty fine basassery. [thanks S�m�l]

Ordinary People

Arts & Letters / /

Radio Diaries is a collection of National Public Radio programs that were designed to give a voice to people not typically represented in the public forum. Particularly interesting are the prison stories (2001’s main theme), though the audio journals of teenagers, workers, and the elderly are good as well.

This past year, five inmates, four correctional officers and a judge were given tape recorders. For six months, the diarists kept audio journals and recorded the sounds and scenes of everyday life behind bars: shakedowns, new inmate arrivals, roll call, monthly family visits, meals at the chow hall, and quiet moments late at night inside a cell. The series is an intimate and surprising audio portrait of prison life.

The series aired in on NPR’s All Things Considered in January 2001.

In the beginning…

Computers & Internet / /

In the Beginning was the Command Line by Neal Stephenson: An intelligent essay dealing with the trials and tribulations of computer Operating Systems. Of course one of the big problems he discusses is Metaphor Shear (which is basically the point at which a metaphor fails), which is ironic because he uses quite a few metaphors himself in the essay. One of the best is when he relates the Hole Hawg (an incredibly powerful drill that with drill through just about anything, but also incredibly dangerous because it has no limitations or cheap safeguards to protect the user from themself.) with the Linux operating system. The essay is a great read, and goes into much more than just Operating Systems. Highly recommended.

If you like Stephenson’s fiction, you might also want to check out The Great Simolean Caper, an interesting story set in the not to distant future. It shares some common ground with Stephensons other work (namely, Snow Crash) and is quite an enjoyable read. Its also a bit scary, because it brings up quite a few security and privacy concerns. With the advent of digital cable and set-top boxes, companies are starting to track what you are watching on television, whether you like it or not. I’ve seen the data myself, and I think the advertising industry is going to go wild when these numbers start piling up (the data I saw showed enormous spikes and troughs roughly coinciding with commercials). The sneaky set-top boxes in Stephenson’s Caper might seem unlikely, but we’re really not too far away from that right now…

THEY are coming!

Arts & Letters / /

The Day They Let Bernard Leave by John Robinson (.pdf file) : A cryptic and ambiguous short story in which a man named Bernard has a very strange day. Everyone is staring at him; even, sometimes, being nice to him. Strange. Anyway, its a good read if you don’t mind the ambiguity of it all. Is Bernard as lucky as everyone thinks? I’m not so sure. Anyway, Robinson is an interesting fellow, known to many as “Widgett”. He runs a website called, NeedCoffee.com which is quite an interesting mix (not unlike Kaedrin, but more interesting and older:). He also has a production company called One Tusk and recently pubished a book of poetry called Love Letters Unsent to People Unmet. Check it out. Another story by Robinson: Necrogarchy, another interesting offering…

Sorry for the lack of updating lately. Things got a bit busy during the holiday season, plus I can’t seem to run into much in the way of interesting stuff lately, so you’ll have to bear with me. I did get my Best of 2000 movies list up (yes, thats 2000, its a year late, I know). Lets see, what else? I’ve been spending a lot of time at Everything2 lately. Its a fun place.

Tabula Rasa!

Arts & Letters / /

Dialogue on Film and Philosophy by Ulf Wilhelmsson (in rich text format) : What if, say, Quentin Tarantino met Aristotle, Herakleit, Plato, Jean-Paul Sartre, David Hume, Immanuel Kant and other famous philosophers. What would it be like if they all sat down and had a conversation on film and philosophy? Ulf Wilhelmsson attempts to expore these ideas in this interesting little essay. Much of it plays out like an informative introduction to various philosophies, as the aformentioned participants spout off about their particular areas of interest and eventually apply them to film. Obviously, this is much more entertaining if you are at least somewhat familiar with the various participants. Most of the philosophers are very well known, but I’d be suprised if many people knew all of the film scholars mentioned (Wilhelmsson thoughtfully includes explainations for the more obscure folks that show up). Theres also a bit of a lighthearted tone that lets some of the philosophers even get rowdy (at one point St Thomas Aquinas and Aristotle yell “Tabula Rasa!” in unison). Interesting reading. [via Wood S Lot]

Reflections on LotR

Movies / /

By the way, I saw Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring on Teusday night (or Wednesday morning, if you prefer), and I was completely blown away. I think I must feel the same way people felt when walking out of the original Star Wars. I would describe the film as a sweeping epic, in the true sense of those words (before they were perverted by the use of critics describing the like of, say, Gladiator) and Peter Jackson should be honored for being able to capture the spirit of Tolkien’s work while, at the same time, not shutting out those who are not familiar with the books. This is perhaps one of the most ambitious efforts in film history, and Jackson actually manages to imbue the film with the depth and texture that it demands. From beginning to end, the film showcases the grand beauty of Middle Earth, with graceful vistas, immense landscapes of forbidding snow or rolling greenery, and sweeping shots of terrifying battles, but don’t let that fool you – Jackson was able to temper the pace and suspence of the film so that its scale does not detract from it. This is grand filmmaking, yes, but Jackson also focuses on the human side, letting his wonderful actors do their thing and also showing the details of Middle Earth’s history and architecture… This is an adventurous effort at its best, and its one of the best movies I’ve seen in a long time.