Movies

It’s All Geek to Me by Neal Stephenson: After a lengthy absence, Stephenson returns with an oped in the NY Times. He tackles the film 300 from various geeky angles, and in the process, he hits on a few ideas that I’ve been thinking about recently.

Critics at a festival in Berlin walked out, and accused its director of being on the Bush payroll.

Thermopylae is a wedge issue!

Lefties can’t abide lionizing a bunch of militaristic slave-owners (even if they did happen to be long-haired supporters of women’s rights). So you might think that righties would love the film. But they’re nervous that Emperor Xerxes of Persia, not the freedom-loving Leonidas, might be George Bush.

This seems to be happening more and more these days. Somebody makes a movie without any intention of making a political statement, and then liberals and conservatives fall all over themelves in an attempt to spin the movie in their favor. This isn’t limited to movies or other forms of art either (nor is it limited to politics, for that matter – people often spin things in subjective ways). For instance, talk to anyone who has strong opinions about politics and they’ll tell you that the media is biased against them. It’s amusing, really.

When I saw 300, the thought that this might be applicable to our current political situation occurred to me, but I dismissed it pretty quickly. I’m sick of politics and have been for a while now, which brings me to another point Stephenson makes:

When science fiction tackles classical themes, the results may look a bit odd to some, but the audience – which is increasingly the mainstream audience – is sufficiently hungry for this kind of material (and, perhaps, suspicious of anything that’s overly polished) that it is willing to overlook the occasional mistake, or make up for it by shouting hilarious things from the balcony. These people don’t need irony or campiness self-consciously pointed out to them, any more than they need a laugh track to enjoy “The Simpsons.”

The Spartan phalanx presents itself to foes as a wall of shields, bristling with spears, its members squatting behind their defenses, anonymous and unknowable, until they break formation and stand out alone, practically naked, soft, exposed and recognizable as individuals.

The audience members watching them play the same game: media-weary, hunkered down behind thick irony, flinging verbal jabs at the screen – until they see something that moves them. Then they’ll come out and feel. But at the first hint of politics, they’ll jump back behind their shield-wall, just like the Spartans when millions of Persian arrows blot out the sun, and wait until the noise stops.

I’ve been thinking a lot about politics in art, and I don’t think it’s as influential as it once was. The modern world is so saturated with politics and hyperbolic outrage that yet another movie or album that decries war or globalization or secularization or whatever is just, well, lame. You look at someone like George Orwell and you can see why he wrote what he did and why he wrote how he wrote. If he were writing today, I bet it would seem gimmicky and lame.

Alas, at the end of the article, it didn’t mention that Stephenson would be releasing a new book anytime soon. I know he’s working on the Diamond Age Miniseries, but I’m still impatient for his next book, whatever it may be. These NY Times opeds are nice and all, but they seem too short for Stephenson. I like it better when he rambles on for a few hundred pages.

Every couple of years, someone gets the bright idea to adapt Alan Moore’s classic graphic novel Watchmen into a movie. Some work is done, then the project falls flat. To get an idea for how long this has been going on, I wrote about it on this blog over five years ago, and at that point, it had already been stuck in “development hell” for over a decade.

For a long time, Terry Gilliam was attached to direct. He was a big name, but he was also quite ambitious and known for getting mired in long, failed productions. By the end, he wanted to make a 12 hour film (or mini-series) out of the comic. One would have to applaud that sort of ambitious thinking, but it’s easy to see how Gilliam didn’t get anywhere. In any case, he eventually fell off the map, and in one of the more retarded Hollywood moves of recent history, screenwriter David Hayter was brought on not only to revise the existing Sam Hamm script (which was good, except for the changed ending) but also to direct. Hayter had achieved some clout because of his involvement with the X-Men films, but handing such a complex story to a first-time director seemed quite foolish. Luckily, that period didn’t last long, and a few years later, up-and-coming indie director Darren Aronofsky attached himself to the project. This was all kinds of cool and the film geek community was delighted. Actors started clamoring for roles, including Jude Law, who’s apparently quite the fanboy. Alas, it was not to be. Aronofsky left the production to focus on his dream project, The Fountain.

Paramount was still anxious to get the film started, so they sought out a replacement and eventually settled on Paul Greengrass. Though not as well-known as Gilliam and not as hip and trendy as Aronofsky, the choice of Greengrass was inspired and of all the directors who’ve expressed interest in Watchmen, I think he would have been my favorite. Like Aronofsky, Greengrass is an up-and-coming director. However, unlike anyone else attached to the project, Greengrass has also proven to be quite adept at making movies with a political element that doesn’t suck (United 93, Bloody Sunday), while at the same time being able to direct a decent character-based action movie (The Bourne Supremacy). Watchmen would involve interweaving elements of both, among other thematic material. Unfortunately, an executive shuffle at Paramount meant that Watchmen would again get the boot. This is understandable. When a major studio undergoes a change in leadership, all greenlit projects are scrutinized. Watchmen had a long history of false-starts, a big budget, and a story that was… not family friendly (to put it nicely). Put yourself in the position of a newly appointed studio head, and then ask yourself if you’d really want to start off by attempting to make what many consider an unfilmable movie?

So the plug was pulled yet again, and Greengrass went on to make United 93 instead (and it’s a masterpiece, imhbco). The movie sat in limbo until about a year ago, when director Zack Snyder, who was in post-production for the now-released hit 300 (an adaptation of Frank Miller’s classic comic), was tasked with bringing Watchmen to the screen. 300 was released last week and ground it’s way to an astounding $70 million opening weekend. I saw it, and while I enjoyed it, I have to admit that I’m not sure he’s going to be able to handle Watchmen‘s complex themes. He’s certainly talented, and I’m not counting him out, but his previous work simply doesn’t tackle anything as ambitious as Watchmen. He directed a spirited remake of Dawn of the Dead that was quite entertaining (certainly among the best of the recent spate of horror movie remakes) but not exactly challenging. Ditto for the cliched but gorgeous and action-packed 300. I have to admit that I’m intrigued by the possibility of a Watchmen movie, and Snyder isn’t a bad choice. Indeed, the unexpected success of 300 augurs well for the Watchmen production, which is now slated to start shooting this summer. For that alone, Snyder deserves some credit, as he might be the one who will finally bring it to the screen.

Indeed, Snyder appears to have begun some early concept work on his new project. Last summer, at the San Diego Comic-Con, Snyder and Miller showed some footage from 300 and did a Q and A. The footage was too bloody for an official widespread release, but of course, you can’t stop the signal. It appeared on You Tube shortly after the comic-con and has supposedly played an important role in the marketing of 300. However, just a few weeks ago, someone discovered a little secret burried in the footage. Hidden between warring Spartans and Persians is a single frame of what appears to be Rorschach (perhaps the most recognizeable character from the Watchmen comic):

Well, it’s a little dark (click the image for a much higher resolution image), but it’s definitely Rorschach. The high resolution image was released by Harry Knowles, who also confirms that it is an official “test shot” that Snyder worked on (i.e. it won’t be a part of the final film, it’s just a concept shot).

I think it looks great, though it’s a little difficult to tell with a static image how they’re really going to do the mask (in the comic, the ink blot pattern changes from frame to frame, though there are some duplicates and consistency at work).

My guess is that after all this time, Watchmen is finally on its way to the big screen. Will it be good? The talent is certainly there, from the producers to the screenwriters to the director (though I really wanted to see what Greengrass would do with it, I’m sure Snyder will do fine and may even surprise me), but I’ll believe it when I see it. I have to admit that I’m a little hesitant about how this film will turn out though, and I worry that it will fall into the same traps that V for Vendetta did. Watchmen seems to be very much a product of its time, for instance, and I’d worry that the filmmakers will want to update it. To be fair, I have not heard that this will be happening, though I was mildly disapointed by the change to the ending that I read in Sam Hamm’s original script (however, I read that script a long time ago — Hayter has supposedly revised the script to be more faithful to the source material, but time will tell). Adaptations in general are challenging, as some of the things that make a piece of art work in one medium don’t necessarily translate well to another medium. In the end, I’ll still be excited to see this finally reach the screen… and for the first time in many years, it looks like there’s a fair chance that it’s going to happen.

Unrelated to Watchmen, but pretty funny, is that the tendency to sneak a single frame into a trailer is apparently becoming somewhat common: see the hidden frame in Mel Gibson’s Apocalypto trailer. Hilarious.

To wrap up the animation marathon (which should have taken six weeks, but took around four months instead), the Filmspotting podcast gave out some awards. I’ll do the same, and I’ll make some other closing comments.

• Best Character: This one has to go to the Iron Giant. He’s this wonderful childlike character who has a great arc in the film. You would expect the movie to be more about how the Giant changed everyone else’s lives (which it does, and I don’t mean to diminish that), but it’s really about the robot itself, and how it grows and overcomes it’s original programming. The way we learn about the Giant and how the arc is handled by the filmmakers just makes this the most compelling character in the marathon.
• Best Villain: This is a tough one, as there are more good choices here. All the films have a compelling villain, but I’m going to go with Akira. Even though we don’t see Akira until the end of the film, his presense looms over everything that preceeds it, and I kinda get the feeling that Akira is behind it all. Akira, to me, seems to be more than the physical manifestation of a young boy, but rather the catastrophic force that is unleashed as a result of human meddling (so, in a sense, Tetsuo is kinda part of this villain).
• Best Scene: This is another hard one, but I’m going to have to agree with Adam from filmspotting in picking the brutal “Setsuko death montage” towards the end of Grave of the Fireflies. It’s quite possibly the most depressing scene I’ve ever seen, and while I don’t ever want to watch it again, I have to admit that it is the most powerful thing I watched in the marathon.
• Most Visually Stunning: I think it’s pretty obvious that this is between Spirited Away & Akira, both of which are truly impressive works of animation. Part of me wants to give it to Spirited Away because of the incredible imagination that went into every visual element of the film, but while Akira’s story does not require as much in the way of imagination, it’s visual elements truly are spectacular (all the moreso because of the technology available at the time). We’ll call this a tie.
• Best Film: This one is difficult. For me, it comes down to Spirited Away, The Iron Giant, and Grave of the Fireflies. While Fireflies is easily the most emotionally draining of the six films and quite well done in every respect, I can’t bring myself to say it’s the best film. It’s just too heartbreaking. I’ll give this award to Spirited Away. It’s just so good that I have a hard time talking about it (and not just because I’m afraid of ruining it for others, as I implied in my review). Sometimes this sort of thing can be inexplicably subjective, and Spirited Away is one of those cases.

None of this is to say that Watership Down or Ghost in the Shell were bad films, they just didn’t neatly fit into the categories (if there was a “most thought provoking” award, it’d certainly go to Ghost in the Shell). All the films in the marathon were well done and certainly worth a watch, especially if you’re not familiar with the genre (or if you’re only familiar with the Disney style of the genre).

The one thing that bothers me about the list of films in the marathon was that the Anime portion was almost criminally short. While I think the Anime films in the marathon are all sorta landmark achievements, they are really only touching the surface of the genre, and a few of them are, well, difficult films (especially Fireflies). If I were to introduce someone to the genre, I’d probably start with Spirited Away. In any case, this will not be the last you hear about Anime on the blog, though I’m not sure where I’m headed next. I think at some point, I’ll have to list out all the Anime that I’ve seen and solicit some suggestions… but for now, I’ve got several live-action films in my Netflix queue that I’ve been neglecting.

So the animation marathon was on a bit of a hiatus, as I was pretty much playing along with the Filmspotting guys, and they got caught up in best-of-2006 lists (like me) and film festivals (not yet for me, but the Philly fest is in April). They started up again last week, and will be finishing up on Friday. I’d already seen the last two films in the marathon, but unlike the other ones I saw before (Akira and Ghost in the Shell) my opinion of these has not changed much (they’re just as good as before). As such, I won’t be spending a ton of time on either one… but I think these are the two most enjoyable films in the marathon. There will be one more post after this one, wrapping up the marathon (though I have a sneaking suspicion that this will not be the last of animation on this blog). Without further adieu, here are the last two films in the marathon (these reviews will be considerably less spoiler-laden than other marathon reviews).

• Spirited Away: Of the four Hayao Miyazaki films that I’ve seen, I believe this to be the best. This is either a really easy film to review, or really hard. Easy because all it requires is that I give it an enthusiastic recommendation (which I do, go see it!). That’s all you really need, but I’ll give you the primary (spoiler free) reason: the film’s story has many turns that are unexpected, but necessary and logical. For the most part, I didn’t know what to expect for the duration of the movie. By the end, I couldn’t see any other way the story could have progressed, but I couldn’t see where it was going at any point in the story. I guess I should mention that this sort of story actually turns some people off (in the Filmspotting review, Adam felt like I do, while Sam didn’t particularly like that part of it, though he still recommended the film). Visually, it’s spectacular, and Miyazaki perfectly captures some of the subtleties of childhood (like, say, Japanese cootie shots). And this is where the hard part comes in: because of the unexpected way in which the story progresses, I don’t want to ruin it for you. Just go watch it. When you’re done, check out Steven’s spoiler-laden thoughts.
• The Iron Giant: As I already mentioned, I’ve seen this film before, and I liked it a lot. It was similar to what I was used to in an animated film, but also very different. Upon revisiting it, I was not all that surprised to find that the film was made by Brad Bird, the creator of The Incredibles. Both films share a similar quality, and they’re both great (personally, I prefer The Incredibles, but Giant is still quite good). The Iron Giant is probably the best American 2D animated film in the past 10 years or so.

  

  It follows the story of an innocent giant alien robot that lands on earth and befriends a little boy. A paranoid government agent wreaks havoc when he finds out about it and tries to destroy the robot (which is programmed for self-defense). There are a lot of things to like about this movie: the story, the characters, and the visuals are all great. But in the end, it’s the childlike Giant that steals the show. Sam from Filmspotting called the Giant one of the greatest characters ever, and it would be hard to argue against that. It’s got the elements of a preachy movie, but it doesn’t go too far overboard, and it’s incredibly entertaining anyway. (More screenshots and possible spoilers below the fold)

This just about wraps up the animation marathon. Another short post covering what Filmspotting is tentatively calling “The Harryhausens” (animation marathon awards) and we’re done.

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Animation Marathon: Spirited Away and The Iron GiantRead More »

It’s that time again. I’ll be liveblogging the Oscars again tonight, as is tradition here at Kaedrin (previous installments: 2006, 2005 and 2004). Now, I’ve seen more movies in 2006 than any other year I can think of and yet, I still haven’t seen the majority of the nominees. Like that matters. Once again, I’ll have to rely on the intangibles of the Oscars in determining who is going to win (incidentally, my average for the past 3 years is around 74%, which should tell you something about the intangibles).That said, this year’s picks seem a little more popular with regular folks than last year’s lineup. As John Scalzi notes:

This is another low-grossing year for the Oscars, since aside from The Departed, none of the Best Picture nominees has cleared $100 million. However, it’s not the total commercial embarrassment last year’s slate was — only two of this year’s Best Picture nominees have been outgrossed by a Best Documentary nominee instead of all of them. It’s progress!

Indeed! However, I’m betting that within the next decade, a Best Documentary film will be nominated for Best Picture. But I digress. On with the picks:

• Best Picture: This is actually the toughest of the major categories. The only film that gets an obvious axe is The Queen, as I suspect the voters will think the Best Actress nod will be enough. I’d say that Eastwood’s Letters from Iwo Jima is next on the chopping block, as it’s a foreign language film told from the perspective of our enemy. Little Miss Sunshine probably has a better chance than a lot of critics say, because it’s the only one of the nominees that people seem to really enjoy. The academy typically doesn’t reward comedies, but Sunshine has a sorta Shakespeare in Love (which somehow managed to beat out Saving Private Ryan in 98) feeling to it. The popular choices generally seem to fall between Babel and The Departed. Neither film seems to be tremendously popular with the Academy, but I’ll say that The Departed will have the momentum tonight, and that will be my choice.
• Best Director: Martin Scorsese. I mean, come on, the guy is due. Not only that, but The Departed is legitimately a great film. The only real threat comes from Clint Eastwood, but I suspect that the Academy will recognize that Clint already has two statues for directing and will want to right their several wrongs (i.e. Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, and Goodfellas). This is complete speculation, but I’d like to think that academy members, which are predominantly actors, will fall into line on this one. Hell, I bet Clint would vote for Scorsese. One other note: It’s really nice to see Paul Greengrass get the nomination as he did an outstanding job in United 93, but it’s a sympathy nomination that won’t carry over to the award.
• Best Actor: Forest Whitaker for The Last King of Scotland. The only thing he has going against him is that, from what I understand, he plays more of a supporting role. But he has a lot going for him, not the least of which is that he apparently gives a stellar performance. Plus, I don’t see much in the way of competition. Then again, I haven’t seen any of the films in this category (!), so I could be completely off base. If Leonardo DiCaprio was nominated for The Departed, I think he would have been a good dark horse, but somehow I don’t think Blood Diamond has legs. Peter O’Toole has some momentum, but I don’t think it’s enough to unseat Whitaker as the favorite.
• Best Actress: Helen Mirren for The Queen. No contest here.
• Best Supporting Actor: Eddie Murphy in Dreamgirls. The film got the snub for Best Picture and Director, so I’m betting they’ll have the sympathy vote in the smaller categories. Alan Arkin has a fair chance here, though.
• Best Supporting Actress: Jennifer Hudson for Dreamgirls. I think she’s pretty much a lock too.
• Best Original Screenplay: Another difficult category. My superstition is that Screenplay awards tend to go to films that do well commercially, but sometimes don’t do so well in the major categories (the most notable evidence for this that comes to mind is Pulp Fiction, but I called this a superstition for a reason). As such, I think this will go to Little Miss Sunshine. I think this may be a fair predictor to how well Sunshine will do in Best Picture (if it wins screenplay, I think it’s out of the running). I think the other nominees have a fair chance, but Sunshine stands out.
• Best Adapted Screenplay: The Departed. The competition for this is somewhat week. There is some buzz that Borat will take the statue, but I can’t imagine that happening. I mean, was there really a script for most of that movie? It would fit with my Screenplay going to the more popular film theory though…
• Editing: Another tough one, but I think this is going to be The Departed‘s night. I’d say there is a pretty good chance for Babel or United 93 here as well.
• Cinematography: I’ll give this one to Pan’s Labyrinth, though it could also go to Children of Men (personally, I loved the cinematography in The Illusionist, but I don’t think it has a chance). Also, why wasn’t The Fountain nominated? I think it would have an easy win here if it were.
• Visual Effects: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest
• Musical Score: Babel.
• Best Song: Well, it’s almost certainly a song from Dreamgirls, but three were nominated! I’ll just pick “Listen.”
• Makeup: Pan’s Labyrinth.
• Best Animated Film: <a href="Cars“>Cars.
• Best Documentary: An Inconvenient Truth (though it could easily go to one of the other nominees).
• Best Foreign Language Film: Pan’s Labyrinth.

Well, that’s it for now. Check back around Oscar time for lots of updates! Feel free to post your picks in the comments…

Update 8:28 pm: Oh boy! Only 2 minutes to go! I don’t get the appeal of the preshows. The Barbara Walters special is theoretically neat, but they didn’t have anyone interesting this year. And I really, really don’t get the red carpet stuff. But I’m not a fashion nerd, so whatever.

Update 8:33 pm: This montage where all the nominees goof off is a great idea. If only these people were more interesting when they give their acceptance speeches. Still, this makes for a great way to start the Oscars. Good sign? Or downhill from here?

Update 8:39 pm: Ok, Ellen’s not doing that bad. I even laughed a couple of times. But I’m going to start drinking. This is probably a bad sign.

Update 8:42 pm: “It’s not that we don’t have time for long speeches, it’s that we don’t have time for boring speeches.” Brilliant. I’ve heard that the Oscar producers have been pushing for winners to be more interesting and do less “thanking” of random people. We’ll see, I guess.

Update 8:48 pm: Pan’s Labyrinth takes the Art Direction award, and deservedly so. Apparently I missed this one when making my pics, but I probably would have picked this one. Annnnd, yep, boring speech.

Update 8:55 pm: Will Ferrell & Jack Black are funny. Comedies really don’t do well at the Oscars. The last outright comedy that won was Annie Hall in 1977. I don’t know if this augors for or against Little Miss Sunshine. And John C. Reilly joins the show! I honestly think that dude should have been nominated for Best Supporting Actor for his work in Talledega Nights. Funny stuff.

Update 8:58 pm: Pan’s Labyrinth takes the Makup award. So far, I’m 1 for 1.

Update 9:01 pm: Poor kids. Not only were they forced to get up in front of the entire world and read bad jokes off the teleprompter, but they’re presenting the award for animated shorts.

Update 9:02 pm: Yeah! The Danish Poet won. Woo Hoo! I can’t believe it won! It’s so exciting! Holy shit, I never thought they’d reward that short! This is great!

Update 9:04 pm: West Bank Story wins the live action short award, and the clip they showed is actually kinda funny (it’s a comedy/musical that takes place between to falafel stands in Israel/Palestine) . And holy crap, Jack Nicholson has no hair! Sorry, just saw that. And this guy is actually giving a decent speech.

Update 9:07 pm: Man, I hate trackbacks. I’m temporarily removing the Scalzi link at the top of this post, as I have to wait for the trackback to fail every time I update this post. I’ll put it back in later. Sorry John!

Update 9:13 pm: This sound effects choir is pretty neat. Another good idea. Hey, is that Michael Winslow from the Police Academy movies? This is pretty awesome.

Update 9:16 pm: Sound editing jokes were actually kinda funny. Another award I neglected to pick. Sorry. Letters from Iwo Jima takes the award and… yep, boring thank yous. Seriously, maybe they should forbid anything but a generic thank you and we’ll get more interesting acceptance speeches.

Update 9:18 pm: I guess we’re getting all the boring awards out of the way first, huh? I wonder how they decide what order to do the awards in. Sometimes they’ll put big awards at the beginning of the show, which I guess is supposed to suck in viewers, and then keep them watching until the end. Which is better? You got me. Dreamgirls wins Sound Mixing. It being a musical, I guess that makes sense (another award I didn’t pick).

Update 9:25 pm: Best Supporting Actor goes to… Alan Arkin! I’m 1 for 2 now, but I don’t have any issues with it. Hmm, does Ellen know if Scorsese won? This would be kinda cruel if he didn’t.

Update 9:35 pm: I’ve made no secret that I hate the musical performances at the Oscars (with the notable exception of Blame Canada and that time Antonio Banderas came out and sang that song, which was so bad as to be entertaining). Putting two in a row is a mixed blessing. It’s bad because, well, I have to endure it. But it’s good because we’re at least getting some of it over with, like ripping off a band aid really fast. I almost wish they’d do all the nominees now.

Update 9:37 pm: Yay global warming!

Update 9:43 pm: Ok, so not only has Jack Nicholson shaved his head, but he’s wearing sunglasses too. Every year, some idiot does this. Samuel L. Jackson made it work. Nicholson kinda does, but a part of me just thinks he got high and didn’t want anyone to know. Best Animated Feature goes to Happy Feet. Crap. I’m 1 for 3.

Update 9:46 pm: Affleck was the bomb in Phantoms, yo! Montages are actually pretty entertaining…

Update 9:51 pm: William Monahan wins for The Departed, making me 2 for 4. He at least makes a funny comment at the beginning of his speech before devolving back into the thank yous.

Update 10:01 pm: Costumes, yet another award I neglected to pick, goes to Marie Antoinette. Her speech was filled with thank yous, but it was still kinda decent…

Update 10:07 pm: As Tom Cruise kisses some studio head’s ass, I just want to mention that in the above entry, I didn’t mean to imply that Marie Antoinette’s reanimated corpse gave an acceptance speech. It was the costume designer for the movie, not Marie. Whoa, what’s going on with her neck? Again, I’m not referring Marie Antoinette, but the studio head woman.

Update 10:11 pm: Ellen got Stephen Spielberg to take a picture of Clint Eastwood and her so that she could put it on MySpace. It was funnier than it sounds.

Update 10:14 pm: Cinematography goes to Pan’s Labyrinth, and I’m at 3 for 5.

Update 10:21 pm: Heh, Robert Downey jr making fun of his drug abuse. Why are there only three nominees for visual effects this past year? Strange. Oscar goes to Pirates, and after a rocky start I’m at 4 for 6. Another joke in an acceptance speech! And I can tell he made it up on the spot because he referenced a joke from earlier in the night.

Update 10:30 pm: Mitchieville is also liveblogging: “If you are watching the Osacrs right now, you’re listening to two insufferable foreigners yammering on about nothing. Just hurry the hell up, foreigners, I gotta pee.” And holy crap, Pan’s Labryinth doesn’t win! How can this be? Seriously, what’s going on here? I’ve never heard of “Lives of Others” but come on, how can Pan’s Labryinth lose this award? I guess it was a little too dark for the academy…

Update 10:33 pm: A tribute to Snakes on a Plane? Why not?

Update 10:37 pm: And best supporting actress goes to Jennifer Hudson. I guess they can’t all be upsets. I’m 5 for 8. Ok, she thanked God twice. Kissass.

Update 10:40 pm: It’s not the Superbowl, but the Oscars always has some good new commercials. There’s been a couple, but the highlight has to be Wes Anderson’s American Express commercial about a half hour ago: “Can you do a .357 with a bayonet?” Heh.

Update 10:50 pm: Hey, it’s Jerry Seinfeld and they let him badmouth theaters. Nice. Best Documentary goes to An Inconvenient Truth. Shocker. I’m 6 for 9. Yay global warming.

Update 10:55 pm: Ennio Morricone’s spaghetti western scores are so awesome, and I had no idea that he did all these other ones and oh damn, a music performance that isn’t even one of this year’s nominees. I’m getting another beer.

Update 11:00 pm: I think Ennio Morricone just cursed in Italian and Clint is just winging it in an attempt to cover it up.

Update 11:09 pm: Best original score goes to Babel and I’m at 7 for 10. Guy is boring. You get the picture.

Update 11:11 pm: Oh shit, the president of the Academy. And he’s cheating on a bet. Run!

Update 11:15 pm: And Original Screenplay goes to Little Miss Sunshine. I thought this was a tough category, but now that I think about it, Sunshine was the obvious choice. Hence my pick, and I’m at 8 for 11.

Update 11:28 pm: Best orignal song goes to… An Inconvenient Truth? Huh, I guess I should have seen that coming – by having three nominations, Dreamgirls probably ended up splitting their votes. Plus, Hollywood is falling all over themselves for Al Gore. Hopefully no more music performances tonight. Indeed, we’re getting to a point where the only awards left are going to be big ones. Yay global warming. I’m at 8 for 12.

Update 11:35 pm: Michael Mann’s look at America? Intriguing, but it turns out to be just another montage. A good one, though.

Update 11:44 pm: Gah, I forgot about the Editing award. It goes to The Departed, and she makes an interesting comment about this being the third Scorsese film to win for Editing. Is the next half hour going to be all Marty, all the time?

Update 11:46 pm: Dammit, I forgot about the annual dead people montage. Come on, get to the good awards people!

Update 11:52 pm: As an aside, why wasn’t Philip Seymour Hoffman nominated for MI III? Oh, and Hellen Mirren wins, of course. In fact, I wrote and published this before she actually won.

Update 11:54 pm: You see, I was right. She won (Take that, Sov!). And I’m at 10 for 14. The way they’re going, they’re probably going to put Best Director as the last award announced. And Scorsese will lose.

Update 12:04 am: Just announce the award already! Alright, Forest Whitaker wins, got it, NEXT! (No, I’m not impatient, why? I’m at 11 for 15.)

Update 12:07 am: Three Amigos? Uh, yeah, whatever, just tell us that Scorsese won. Please.

Update 12:10 am: Holy fuck, he won. Three 6 Mafia: One, Martin Scorsese: One. It’s a dead heat now. Heh, I bet he’s had that “check the envelope” joke ready for 15 years (and like, 5 nominations). Great speech, and thank God we won’t have to endure the “Will he win” debate every time he makes a film (we probably will, but one can hope).

Update 12:14 am: And The Departed takes best picture. Congrats Marty, it’s a great night for your film.

Final Update 12:17 am: Ungh, it started out good, but went mostly downhill until the end when Scorsese won. I ended up at 13 for 17, which is around 76% (a little above average for me). So much for this being a night of upsets (except for Pan’s Labyrinth losing out on best foreign language film, which it totally deserved.) I think maybe I’ll have to take the DVR approach that James Berardinelli mentioned in his post, thus condensing the Oscars into about an hour or so.

The Actual Final Update 2.26.07, 7:00 pm: It appears that Alex has also liveblogged the event, while Steven thinks that the Academy is running out of time to give Roger Corman the lifetime achievement award (I concur).