6 Weeks of Halloween

After enjoying last week’s original Invasion of the Body Snatchers, I decided to check out the remake, which I had never seen. Suitably inspired, I added two more seventies horror movies to the hopper for this week’s theme. Not the most creative of themes, but it will have to do. Let’s get to it:

• Night of the Creeps (trailer)
• Invasion Of The Bunny Snatchers (Looney Tunes)
• The Invasion (trailer)
• Invasion of the Body Snatchers – Perhaps due to the usual stigma applied to remakes, I wasn’t expecting that much out of this, so I was surprised at how much I ended up enjoying it. It mostly follows the same beats from the original, but director Philip Kaufman brings a stylish eye to the proceedings, deploying every visual trick in the book. You could say that the camera work and goofy camera angles is distracting or showy, but it’s all used to add to the story, so I was pretty happy with that aspect. Adding to the tension is a buzzing, pulsing electronic score that is stereotypically 70s (but in a good way). Gone are the Cold War allusions (which weren’t that thick to begin with), replaced instead with the paranoia and conspiracy that characterizes so much of 70s cinema. The story has moved from a small California town to San Francisco proper (allowing for many interesting canted camera angles), and our heroes, played by Donald Sutherland (rockin a bitchin porno stache) and Brooke Adams, work for the Department of Health.

  

  We also get a slightly better idea of how the actual imitation process actually works. As much as I enjoyed the first movie, the process by which the pod people duplicate people doesn’t make much sense. Here it is marginally better, though still quite fuzzy in its own right. The special effects are also slightly better, and more creepy as well. There’s a fabulous credits sequence that shows the pods traveling through space, landing on earth and taking root within our ecosystem (the sequence ends with a bizarre cameo featuring Robert Duvall dressed as a priest and swinging on a swingset with a bunch of kids, very weird).

  

  

  The sequence goes on for a solid 5-10 minutes, which is representative of the movie overall. It is a bit too long, perhaps because Kaufman takes so much time playing with the camera instead of rocketing the story along. That being said, I kinda enjoy that they took the extra time to do that sort of thing, and I love that opening sequence. The supporting cast, including folks like Jeff Goldblum and Leonard Nimoy (!), is also pretty fantastic. As I noted last week, the ending of the original seemed rushed and a little odd. The ending of this remake is more cohesive, though being the 70s, it’s not exactly upbeat (and if you goof off on the internets a lot, you’ve probably seen the gif of it floating all over the place). Overall, I really enjoyed this one, which certainly stands up as a worthy remake (if not quite the top tier). It’s weird enough (the aforementioned Duvall cameo and of course, that dog with a human face!?) to have carved out its own identity, while still remaining true to the original story. ***

• Honest Zombie (Robot Chicken)
• Shaun of the Dead (trailer)
• Zombi 2 (trailer)
• Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things – Unfortunately, the best thing I can say about this early Bob Clarke (of Black Christmas and, uh, Christmas Story fame) movie is that I love the title. It calls to mind those weird titles from Italian Giallos, and the sequence leading up to the title is probably my favorite in the movie. So it started off well enough for me, but it sorta fell apart from there…

  

  Instead, we’re left with a rather bland zombie movie about a group of kids from some sort of theater troupe who travel to a small island that is apparently used solely as a graveyard. They dig up a body and play around with some evil satanic ceremony intended to bring back the dead. Naturally, they’re more successful than planned and hijinks ensue. Clearly a very low budget affair, and though there’s some decent makeup on the dead folks, there isn’t really any real gore factor to make up for a lackluster plot. I’m not a big gore hound or anything, but since the story in zombie movies is uniformly non-existent and boring, I can usually count on gore to keep things interesting. This movie has decent performances for what it is and there’s one or two small twists that work, I guess, but it’s ultimately a ho-hum zombie affair that didn’t really do much for me. The characters are kinda meh, and the cinematography leans a little too dark (though this is clearly a bad transfer – I wonder how much better it would look if it got the Criterion treatment or something). So I clearly didn’t love this movie, though to be fair, I’m not a huge zombie fan to start with, so maybe you zombie lovers will enjoy it more than I did… *1/2

• How Scream Should Have Ended (short)
• Black Christmas (1974 trailer)
• Black Sabbath (trailer)
• When a Stranger Calls – What a strange movie. I could have sworn I’d seen it before, but it turns out that I only really saw the beginning of the movie. Indeed, most of what you think about with this movie is that first 20 minutes (the recent remake attempted to take this opening and stretch it out to an hour and a half. I haven’t seen it, but reviews were mixed to poor…). There’s a sorta reprise of the opening in the last 20 minutes, but everything inbetween is a curveball.

  

  Our heroine (played by Carol Kane) disappears for a solid hour of the movie, where instead we follow Charles Durning’s private investigator character in a weird sorta police procedural drama. The movie even attempts to humanize the scumbag murderer, though not too much. It’s just a really odd way to pace the story as that middle act goes on way too long. Of course, the movie is famous for the “call is coming from inside the house!” gag (which was seemingly lifted wholesale from the aforementioned Black Christmas), but there’s more to like here. If they had managed to tighten up that middle act, this could have been a really solid movie. As it is, it remains a kinda curiosity, albeit one that’s worth checking out (not before you’ve seen Black Christmas though!). **1/2

That’s all for now. Stay tuned for some more recent horror offerings next week, followed by a week of Neo-Slashers. Other than that, my schedule is still pretty open, so if you have any ideas for movies I should watch, let me know!

My most favoritest time of the year has arrived, carrying with it leaf piles, mutilated pumpkins, decorative skeletons, fake cobwebs, and other oxymoronic traditions that are nominally ghastly but suddenly become socially acceptable. To celebrate the season, I always embark on a six week long horror movie marathon. Why six weeks? Because that’s, like, two weeks better than four (the typical Halloween marathon length).

We kick things off this week with what I’m calling “The Remade”. Mostly because that sounds cool and almost represents a horror movie title of its own, but in reality, I watched three classic horror movies from the 1950s that were remade in the 1970s and 1980s. Remakes have a somewhat spotty reputation amongst film nerds in general, and horror dorks in particular. The recent spate of Platinum Dunes (amongst others) remakes of beloved horror movies seems to be driving the current distaste, mostly with good reason. Remakes from other eras are perhaps not as universally reviled. For my part, I find it difficult to get too worked up about this sort of thing, especially since I’ve realized that a remake is generally accompanied by a corresponding release of a remastered, high-quality edition of the original movie. So yes, the Black Christmas remake wasn’t great, but the original got a fantastic DVD release, so it’s hard to complain. Similarly, this year’s forthcoming The Town That Dreaded Sundown remake is welcome, if only because the original will suddenly come back in print and be widely available too (in this case, the remake shows some promise too, especially since they chose a relatively obscure movie to remake). In any case, movies from the 50s that were remade in the 80s actually worked reasonably well for the remakes (not covered in this post, but could/should be: The Fly, whose remake is superb). But it’s still interesting to go back and revisit the remade, as I did this weekend:

• G.I. Joe – S01E28 – The Germ (TV Episode)
• Phantoms (trailer)
• The Blob (1988 trailer)
• The Blob (1958) – A small meteorite containing a small, blob-like substance that eats everything it comes in contact with, growing as it goes. I don’t know this is the first movie where something falls from the sky and some old dude finds it and pokes it with a stick, only to be consumed by whatever, but it’s certainly the quintessential example of the trope. This is actually a local movie, filmed in a bunch of Philly suburbs like Downingtown, and the famous movie theater and diner are still around in Phoenixville, where they have an annual “Blobfest” and re-enact running from the theater screaming. As a film, it concerns itself greatly with the no-one believes the teenager angle.

  

  You meddling kids!

  More metaphorically, it’s pretty clearly filled with Cold War symbolism, right up to the solution where they drop the blob off in the arctic, literally freezing the problem. I’m sure someone has a global warming polemic in store fore the inevitable next remake. As it is, the 1988 remake turned the threat from outer space aliens to a secret government project. And while the special effects are genuinely creepy and gory, there’s something mean spirited about the remake that doesn’t really jive with me. Which is a shame, because as these things go, the blob itself is a rather fantastic and genuinely alien concept. The original is entertaining enough, though it has some weird tonal issues (like, for instance, the absurdly silly theme song that plays over the beginning of the film). The remake overcorrects into making it a really unpleasant affair. Of course, it’s been done over and over again in pop culture, including Dean Koontz’s novel Phantoms (which is a gazillion times better than the movie adaptation and puts a different spin on a blob-like creature) and more goofy fare, like the episode of G.I. Joe linked above. In the end, this was an interesting enough watch, and worth the stretch for students of the genre. **1/2

• Who Goes There? by John Campbell (Short Story)
• Zombie Zombie (Stop Motion Short)
• The Thing (1982 trailer)
• The Thing from Another World (1951) – Very loosely based on John Campbell’s short story, Who Goes There?, this movie follows a group of scientists and Air Force personnel as they discover a downed spaceship and its alien inhabitant frozen in the ice. Eventually he thaws out, and hijinks ensue. It turns out that I’d never seen this before, which is surprising. It’s played more like a straight creature feature, and as those things go, it’s actually pretty good. A little talky at times, but there are some great shots, especially when the monster shows up (and they do a good job keeping him hidden in the early proceedings).

  

  However, it doesn’t really leverage the “alien impostor” element of the story at all, which was surprising. This is a pretty clear case where John Carpenter’s 1982 remake is superior in almost every way. Not only is it a better adaptation of the original story, but it just works all around. Unlike the mean-spirited nature of The Blob remake, this one strikes a good balance, even while maintaining spectacular creature effects and gore. That being said, the 1951 film is very different, and has its own charms. The Cold War symbolism is probably toned down a bit here, but it’s clearly there, and that’s unsurprising given the nature of the 1950s! The 2011 prequel is a little perfunctory and forgettable, but it’s reasonably effective for what it is. In terms of influence, the original short story has certainly been referenced and homaged repeatedly throughout the years, such as the X-Files episode “Ice”. The original movie is worth a watch for fans, but you’d probably be better served reading the original Campbell story. **1/2

• The Puppet Masters (trailer)
• Slither (trailer)
• Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978 trailer)
• Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956) – I was surprised to find that this was my favorite of the three movies I watched this weekend. A small town is slowly being replaced by emotionless copies of residents. It turns out that they are grown in pods from outer space. More Cold War and Communism symbolism here, and it’s funny, because it’s based on what is, by all accounts, a second rate novel that was preceded by much better received stories by Heinlein (The Puppet Masters) and Bradbury. And yet, Invasion is the one that clearly caught the zeitgeist and has proven to be very influential, inspiring countless remakes and homages.

  

  Not a Pod Person

  I’ll lay this success at the feet of journeyman director Don Siegel, who was famous for accepting junk material and elevating it to something interesting or even great. So while perhaps not as action packed as the other two films, this one nevertheless manages to be the most involving thing I saw this weekend. I wouldn’t call it completely transcendent, and the ending certainly seems abrupt and a little strange, but I can see why it has garnered so much love over the years, and it’s well worth a watch. I actually have not seen the 1978 remake (except for that one clip we all know about), but I’ll probably revisit sometime during this 6WH. ***

So things have gotten off to an interesting start. Thematically, we’ve got a lot of Cold War fears being represented here, lots of alien menaces, communists are everywhere and they’re going to take us over, don’t you know? In addition, there’s a lot of “No one will believe me about the crazy conspiracy” tropes. I’ll have to see if these sorts of themes persist through other 50s movies, or if I just lucked out.

I have no idea what next week’s theme will be, but rest assured, it probably won’t be as quaint as the 1950s conception of horror. Also, just want to give a shoutout to the brainchild of the Six Weeks of Halloween, Kernunrex, who is of course going to put me to shame in terms of the number of movies he watches and quality of commentary he posts, so be sure to check him out. Also, Bonehead XL has already begun his marathon and will surely outpace me as well.

Well here we are, a single day away from Halloween. Six weeks have come and gone, and we’ve watched a heck of a lot of movies. As per usual, I have not actually covered all the movies I’ve seen during the horror movie marathon. Sometimes a movie just doesn’t fit with a given week’s theme, or perhaps I only caught a portion of it on television, and sometimes I just don’t have much to say about a movie. So every year, I close out the marathon with a quick roundup of everything I saw that hasn’t already been covered. Behold:

• Dial M for Murder – Hitchcock’s tale of a man who devises an intricate plot to murder his wife only to find that things go horribly wrong. But he’s able to improvise an impressive plan to evade the police anyway. Or is he? This is an impressively engaging movie considering that 90% of the movie takes place in a rather small apartment, and most of the action consists of simple conversations. I get the impression that folks like Quentin Tarantino cribbed from this while trying to ensure their long dialog scenes maintain a certain level of suspense. This is actually one of the better movies I saw during the 6WH. ***
• Scream 2 – I was listening to the Bangers n’ Mash show on the Scream Tetralogy and they seemed to have a high opinion of this, maybe even preferring it to the first Scream. I haven’t seen it since it came out, and I guess I liked it well enough, but it really didn’t make that much of an impression back then. It’s got some interesting stuff going on, I really like the opening of the movie (something the series generally excels at) and there’s a lot of good banter about sequels and whatnot. Unfortunately, it pretty much falls into the same trap as most sequels and in my mind, doesn’t really compare to the first. This is a fine film though, and worth checking out if you’ve never progressed through the series (the third movie, on the other hand, is a harder sell). **1/2
• It Came from Beneath the Sea – I watched this during the Kaiju week, but since it’s not actually Japanese, I didn’t think it fit into that post. But it’s pretty similar to the Kaiju movies. A giant octopus is attacking boats and eventually even the coast, and a team of plucky scientists is the only thing that can stop it. Or something like that. I’d say it compares favorably to Rodan or Ghidirah, but seeing as though I was not particularly on board with those movies, that’ snot saying much. I wasn’t enthralled, though it has some interesting historical value. **
• Eight Legged Freaks – Good old fashioned fun horror movie about a spider researcher who accidentally doses his collection with some sort of growth serum, thus making them gigantic. This ain’t going to be a transcendent experience or radically challenge your status quo, but it’s a fun way to spend a couple hours. **1/2
• The Cabin in the Woods – This movie is holding up reasonably well, and it’s still a fun romp, especially towards the end. The more I see it, the more the very last scenes bother me, but it’s still a minor complaint. Otherwise, not much different from my previous thoughts on this. ***
• I Spit on Your Grave – I watched this because of a book I was reading that featured a chapter on Rape Revenge films, and boy is this one the mother of them all. It’s a pretty brutal film to watch, but it does have its interesting aspects. A hard one to recommend, but it’s interesting to see how this film prefigured more mainstream efforts later on… **1/2
• The Wicker Man – This is the remake, and yes, it’s every bit as bad as you’ve heard. Is it so bad it’s good? Well, at times it is. Nicolas Cage is kinda sleepwalking through some of the movie, but at other moments, he’s extremely animated and simultaneously terrible and great. The bee sequence is particularly brilliant. But it’s still a terrible movie. Check out Kernunrex’s take, which is much better than mine. *
• The Thing – Not much to say about this one, except that it still holds up pretty well. Great practical effects, fantastic ambiguous ending, and if you haven’t seen it, you really should check it out. ****
• Detention – You guys, I do so love this movie, and it gets better every time I watch it. It’s not for everyone, but I love it. ***1/2
• Tales from the Crypt: Season 2, Episode 1 “Dead Right” – I did manage to watch a bunch of Tales from the Crypt this year, and ran out of Wednesday posts to cover them, so here they are. This first one is a prototypical episode. A fortune teller gives Demi Moore advice on how to get rich by marrying into money. Of course, things work out badly for Demi, and in an ironic way.
• Tales from the Crypt: Season 2, Episode 2 “The Switch” – This episode was directed by Arnold Schwartzenegger! And he even makes an appearance at the beginning with the Cryptkeeper. The story is about an old man in love with a younger woman. To please her, he spends all his money on a way to rejuvenate his body, only to find, well let’s not ruin the ironic ending. It’s a good episode though.
• Tales from the Crypt: Season 2, Episode 3 “Cutting Cards” – Another really good episode, this one stands out primarily because of amazing performances by Lance Henriksen and Kevin Tighe. It also doesn’t follow the typical TFtC formulas, which makes it more interesting.
• Tales from the Crypt: Season 2, Episode 4 “‘Til Death” – And here we have a story where the formula is utterly predicable, and this tale of a gold digging real estate prospector ends badly for him in a way that you can see coming from the very beginning of the episode.
• Tales from the Crypt: Season 2, Episode 5 “Three’s a Crowd” – Another middling episode, this one about a husband who’s convinced his wife is cheating on him is saved primarily by its ending, which is, you guessed it, ironic.
• Tales from the Crypt: Season 2, Episode 6 “The Thing from the Grave” – This one would be mostly forgettable except for the performance by Miguel Ferrer, who plays this smarmy, entitled little prick. As per usual, he gets what’s coming to him.

So there you have it. I’m sure I’ll throw Halloween on tomorrow night, as per tradition, and some of this year’s activities will spill over into the coming weeks of blog posts too. So stay tuned, and have a great holiday!

Coming down the homestretch, this week’s theme was a serendipitous one, as I didn’t realize until I was near finished that these were all 1980s movies, and that their batshit insanity quotient compared favorably with the rest of this year’s marathon. Score. Otherwise, there’s not much to tie these movies together, but still, it was an interesting one.

• Big Horror Brother (Robot Chicken)
• Halloween Hugs (short)
• Evil Dead II (trailer)
• Children of the Corn – Adapted from a Stephen King short story, this is an odd duck of a movie. It clearly strikes a nerve with audiences, and to be sure, there are some really creepy aspects to the story. The kids who’ve taken over the town and murdered all their parents at the behest of some sort of creature pretending to be God is an interesting idea, and some of that stuff lands effectively in this movie. The casting, for instance, works really well. Often movies like this will crumble under the weight of the many adorable moppets required by the story, but this cast is solid.

  

  In particular, Isaac and Malachai are great, as are our heros, Peter Horton and Sarah Conner herself, Linda Hamilton are doing what they can with a poorly conceived character. On the other hand, it’s an interminably silly movie that never really delivers on its premise. Most aspects of the production are functional at best, and some stuff doesn’t work at all. Its hard to really bag on this movie though, because it is a bit on the fun side. It’s got a sorta campy, so-bad-it’s-good vibe that clearly works for folks, as they’ve made a crapton of sequels to this sucker (which I have a mild curiosity about, perhaps we’ll revisit next year). **

• The Sleepover (short)
• The Monster Squad (trailer)
• Slaughter High (trailer)
• Alone in the Dark – This year’s batshit quotient was a bit lacking, but this movie puts us well on our way. It’s the strangest movie of this year’s 6WH marathon, and it’s a fair amount of fun, even if it’s not particularly accomplished. It’s definitely got the most unexpected cast of the year, with folks like Donald Pleasence, Martin Landau, and Jack Palance all hamming it up. But Dwight Schultz (you may know him as Howling Mad Murdock from The A-Team or the weenietastic Barclay from Star Trek:TNG) is the lead, a psychologist who comes to a new hospital to help treat a bunch of psychopaths. Donald Pleasence runs the place, and has installed a fancy new “electric” security system. Naturally, a mysterious power outage lets the pyschopaths, led by Palance, escape. This is a bizarre movie. The opening non sequitur scene is fantastic, but I have no idea why its there. Pleasence seems to be just about as insane as the inmates, and the whole situations is rather strange. When the psychos escape, they immediately head to the general store to stock up on civilian clothes and weaponry, putting on hockey masks and using gardening implements to rip out a cop’s throat (I’m pretty sure that guy heads off screen, never to be seen again). From there, the movie turns towards a more home invasion type scenario. And the ending, well, I don’t know what to make of that either. It’s an interesting movie. It’s not something that will work for any but the most devoted genre hounds, but for us cuckoo nutsos, it’s kinda fun.**1/2
• Chopping Mall (trailer)
• One Last Dive (short)
• Phantasm 2 (trailer)
• Angel Heart – A marked departure from the rather silly two movies above, this one is a much more serious effort. A sorta neo noir movie that only really approaches horror towards the end, though it’s pretty clear from the very start that something is awry. A private detective named Harry Angel (played by Mickey Rourke) is hired through a law firm by a mysterious man named Louis Cyphre (Robert De Niro) to find another mysterious man named Johnny Favourite. Of course, things are not what they appear to be, and everyone Angel interviews seems to wind up dead. In case you can’t tell from the character names, this movie lays on the symbolism with a shovel, and not just with the names. De Niro is just chomping scenery, and his character’s look is perfect, if a bit on the nose (there’s a scene where he’s peeling a hard boiled egg that is utterly fantastic).

  

  There’s all sorts of visual motifs as well (the fan, the elevator to hell, etc…) and director Alan Parker is not shy about laying this stuff on. Parker also has a keen visual sense, and the movie is well composed and gorgeously photographed (this really stood out against the above two movies!) Great supporting performances by Robert De Niro and even Lisa Bonet, and actually, all the performances in the movie are pretty good. The movie does have a sorta languid pace, and could perhaps use some pruning, but it’s otherwise a pretty good little film. I can’t say as though the revelations towards the end are particularly brilliant or well executed (I mean, if you can’t figure out who De Niro really is from the first scene…), but they work well enough, and the movie did manage to get under my skin a bit towards the end. It’s a solid little film, perhaps not for everyone, but it works. ***

Stay tuned for the usual Speed Round on Wednesday, which will finish off this year’s marathon. It’s been a good one, and I’m already looking forward to next year!

Back in Week 2, we watched a few of the Saw sequels, ending on the rather uninspired Saw V. While I don’t particularly love these movies, Saw V was the series’ first clear misfire. Given the rather complicated (and actually pretty impressive) continuity between each film, I thought it would probably be better to finish off the series than to forget all the details and try and come back up to speed next year. So, will the final two installments represent a return to form, or was Saw V the beginning of a downward spiral?

• Saw VI – Of course, this movie picks up right where Saw V left off, with Hoffman (aka Jigsaw Jr.) having triumphed over Agent Strahm and continuing Jigsaw’s work. This time, the target is a health insurance executive, one who finds loopholes to avoid paying out claims. Yep, the Saw series’ attempt to get relevant, I guess. And what’s more, he’s even relevant to the rest of the story(he apparently denied an experimental procedure for Jigsaw a while back). Meanwhile, Jill (Jigsaw’s former wife) gets a box willed to her from Jigsaw, and proceeds to execute Jigsaw’s final request. The police are also beginning to suspect that maybe all is not what it seems. There’s a lot going on here, including a lot of flashbacks, but it holds together much better than the previous installment, and even starts to make a little sense. For his part, Hoffman is really emerging as a good villain, and Jigsaw’s well laid plans allow us to root against Hoffman (not that we weren’t before, but the series seemed content with him taking over for Jigsaw, rather than being a pawn, which is what he really is). The insurance executive is a good subject, and the film mines his story well. Of course, there are lots of traps here, and they’re actually pretty well done. In the end, this isn’t the best film in the series by a long shot, but at least the series is back on track.
• Saw 3D – While I’m sure we’ll see the series reemerge at some point in the future, this was billed as The Final Chapter, and it may be the only film series to reach seven installments in just seven years. Add in the complex and intricate mythology and continuity, and the series does have a certain charm, even if the gore and torture might be over the top. Fortunately, the series manages to go out on a strong note too. This is the best installment since at least IV, and maybe even going back to the original. Part VI ended in a way that set up a bit of a confrontation between Hoffman and Jill, but that doesn’t quite turn out as fun as I thought it might. On the other hand, Hoffman does get what’s coming to him, so there is that. There’s another good Jigsaw target in this one: a guy who faked having survived a Jigsaw trap, and is parlaying that into a book deal and fame (we get a nice flashback of Jigsaw getting his book signed by the fraud, too). There’s even a Jigsaw Survivor’s Support Group, and thus we get to see a bunch of familiar faces… including this guy:

  

  Man, I had really wondered if they’d ever get back to Cary Elwes’ character, and I like what they did with him in this movie, even if it is a tad obvious what his role will turn out to be. I obviously didn’t see this in 3D, and I generally hate that treatment, but in this case, it seems like it forced the filmmakers to come up with more creative traps and less camera jiggling and whatnot, which actually is a good thing. It’s certainly not a perfect film, but it’s actually a fun one, and it ends the series on a high note.

Once again, I can’t say as though I particularly love the series. I like the continuity and puzzle-like nature of most of the plot, but a lot of it seems to be steeped a bit too much in misery for misery’s sake, especially when Hoffman takes over for Jigsaw. Still, I’m impressed with how well the series holds together, and it never devolved into anything really cheap or gimmicky, like making something supernatural or psychic (or, uh, sending Jigsaw into space). This is impressive for a series done on the cheap in short timeframes (seven movies in seven years has to be a record of some kind).

I do think the series and I suppose the sub-genre as a whole, deserves a closer look. There are a lot of things about these movies that could benefit from a deeper dive, both from a series perspective but also from a thematic perspective. I’m not claiming these are particularly enlightened movies, but hey, if people could do it for slashers, it can be done for torture porn. As I mentioned in my previous post on the subject, I love the idea that in 20 years, some dork like me is going to look back on these films from his or her youth and marathon them (like I did with slashers), and then someone smarter than me will contextualize it into our post-9/11 angst or something like that. One can only hope.

In the meantime, we’re running out of runway here. We’ve got one weekend left (no idea what the theme will be, if any) and then the Speed Round and the big day. I think there will be some bleedover into the following weeks as I finish off a few books and whatnot, but it’s been a good year folks. Stay tuned.

By their very nature, anthology films are a challenge. Anthology television series are more forgiving, as each story is meant to be taken on its own merits. An anthology film, though, is comprised of multiple stories that are meant to be watched together. This presents a few big issues. One is that some stories are better than others, leading to a perceived inconsistency in quality. Similarly, tonal shifts between stories can be jarring, though you could argue that this comes back to inconsistency. Finally, what is it about these stories that warrants being grouped together in a single viewing experience? It is this question that ultimately defines the film. In most cases, the talent behind the film is the reason for the anthology. Indeed, all three of this week’s films are like that (more below). Unfortunately, this often leads to those quality or tonal inconsistency issues mentioned earlier, especially if the talent is spread out amongst the segments.

The best anthologies, though, seem to have a purpose, they add up to one larger experience. We’ve already talked about one of these during this year’s Six Weeks of Halloween, back in week 3 – Trick ‘r Treat. It is comprised of smaller stories, but they are interlocking and share the holiday theme. This is, naturally, a more difficult feat to pull off, and a lot of films will use some sort of framing devices to try and tie the stories together somehow, though this is often not very convincing. Trick ‘r Treat also benefited from the fact that it was the product of a singular vision rather than a collaboration (as two of the below are). Ultimately, everything comes down to the typical horror movie measurements. Sometimes a mediocre collection can contain a gem that will stick with you far longer than most full-length features. So let’s dive into a few of these and see what happens.

• Hell No (fake trailer)
• Creepshow (trailer)
• The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror
• Creepshow 2 – I did not realize this until I started watching, but I’d seen this before, many moons ago… but the only segment that I really remembered was the second one. This may very well have been because I only saw the second one. Here in the on-demand digital future, it’s hard to remember stumbling onto a movie on cable late at night, watching for 30 minutes, and then stumbling away. Anywho, this is the second installment of the series in which Stephen King supplies all the stories. George A. Romero remains involved, but as a screenwriter adapting the stories (rather than as director). The three stories are completely unrelated, and have a loose framing device about a child reading a horror comic supplied by a crypt-keeper-like, uh, creature? Whatever. The first story is about a wooden Native American statue that comes to life in order to avenge some injustice that was perpetrated on its owner. Entertaining enough, and very typical anthology story (bad people receive supernatural comeuppance, usually in ironic way). The second tale is the one that I remember, and it follows a group of kids who want to hang out at a lake. After swimming out to the little raft anchored in the middle of the lake, they notice a oily looking blob in the water… and it slowly proceeds to devour our hapless teenage heroes. I was terrified of this segment when I was a youngin, and it actually is a pretty effective setup. The blob in the water is a simple, elegant monster that really struck a nerve with my younger self. Unfortunately, there’s not really anywhere for this story to go, and it ends in typical fashion. The third segment features a hitchhiker that simply won’t die. Like the rest of the film, there’s a base level of competence here that comports itself well enough, I guess. Ultimately, it’s fine, if not really anything special. It’s on Netflix Instant right now, so the effort to see this is minimal, so it’s an enjoyable enough way to spend an hour and a half. **
• Horror Movie Daycare (short)
• Thanksgiving (fake trailer)
• The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror II
• V/H/S/2 – I liked the first installment of this movie, though there were a few nagging complaints – notably the framing device, which was filled with annoying dudebros and made no real sense. This movie has a slightly better framing device, a PI and his assistant go to this house looking for a missing kid, only to find a bunch of VHS tapes and TVs and stuff, which they naturally start watching. This is mostly unrelated to the framing device from the first film, but the circumstances are similar enough that there might be some overarching reason for these framing devices that won’t become clear until a later installment (I’m not holding my breath on that one, though!) Anyway, the gimmick here is found footage on said VHS tapes (wondering how obviously digital footage ended up on an analog tape is probably missing the point), and each segment is done by a different director (or 2 in some cases).

  

  “Phase I Clinical Trials” is directed by Adam Wingard (of You’re Next fame) and features a guy getting a digital eye, which has a built in recorder. Of course, this new technology also allows him to see… things. This segment certainly has the best jump scares of the weekend, and some otherwise effective imagery too, though it ultimately isn’t something that sticks with you. “A Ride in the Park” comes to us from Gregg Hale and Eduardo Sanchez (of Blair Witch fame) and details a zombie outbreak in a unique way. This is clever, and very gory, and reasonably effective, though again, the follow through on these tales isn’t that great. “Safe Haven” is maybe the most effective of the bunch, and it features a lot of really disturbing stuff. It’s directed by Gareth Evans (of The Raid) and Timo Tjahjanto, and it follows a film crew making a documentary about a cult of some kind. Naturally, while they’re their, some weird apocalyptic shit goes down. Now this is one that I did find very unsettling and I have a feeling it will stay with me a bit. Finally, we’ve got “Slumber Party Alien Abduction” from director Jason Eisener (of Hobo with a Shotgun), which is exactly what it sounds like. It’s a little more difficult to follow this one, and while I found the events effective, something about it never quite congealed into something that I particularly enjoyed. Tonally effective, but not my favorite of the bunch. One point of order here, the theme in these stories appears to be that, well, everyone dies. This gets a bit tiresome, and may explain why I wasn’t as invested in the last segment – I knew exactly what would happen to all these characters and didn’t really care. Overall, well, it’s a decent collection, about on par with the first movie. **1/2

• Trick ‘r Treat (trailer)
• It’s the Gifts That I Hate (Robot Chicken)
• The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror III
• Three… Extremes – A cross-cultural anthology from Chinese, Japanese, and Korean directors, this one doesn’t even bother with a framing device, simply presenting each story, one after the other (which, honestly, is fine, as framing devices often come off as being sorta tacked on). First up is “Dumplings” from Fruit Chan, a filmmaker I’m unfamiliar with. And this one is a doozy. It’s almost as if he’s daring you to walk out on this movie in disgust, and yes, I had some severe reservations with this segment once I realized what was going on. But it ultimately boils down to an old story, someone seeking to prolong their life by any means. On that front, it really is effective, if hard to watch (that sound design, ugh). Next, we’ve got Chan-wook Park’s segment, called “Cut”, which follows a director as he’s confronted by a stranger. I won’t ruin the segment, but it is probably the most traditional of the three, while still being somewhat harrowing. It bears a fleeting resemblance to that reviled torture porn genre, though it’s far from the worst on that front. It’s well done, and if you’ve seen his “Vengeance” films, this will strike a familiar note with you. Also worth noting is that the camera is much more dynamic here than in the first segment, and it fits well with this story (which could get a bit static in lesser hands). Finally, we’ve got “Box” from Takashi Miike, the most artistic of the bunch, and the most abstract. There’s a lot of open questions here, but it basically amounts to a writer trying to cope with a tragedy in her past.

  

  Ironically, while this movie has no framing device and none of the three segments are related, it holds together well as one viewing experience (maybe even better than the above two). Furthermore, the themes explored here are deeper and more mature. Attempting to defy the ravages of time, money and class issues, and coping with tragedy; these are not shorts for the faint of heart. On the other hand, this is the longest anthology by far, and I think perhaps even too long. Each segment is around 40 minutes or so, which isn’t that long in the grand scheme of things, but the content didn’t really need that much time. Still, it’s an interesting watch, and I’m glad I got to it. **1/2

Holy crap, I can’t believe we’re already 5 weeks into the Six Weeks of Halloween. I’m betting you’ll be seeing some more horror related posts after the high holiday of horror has come and gone… Anyway, no idea what I’m going to do next week, but stay tuned for the last two Saw films on Wednesday.

I can’t believe we’re already coming down the homestretch of the Six Weeks of Halloween horror movie marathon, but here we are… Tonight, we play along with the Final Girl Film Club and their selection of 2012’s The Last Will and Testament of Rosalind Leigh.

“If you say in the first chapter that there is a rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must go off. If it’s not going to be fired, it shouldn’t be hanging there.” – Anton Chekhov

This concept is known as Chekhov’s Gun. These days, people often refer to it in the context of narrative twist endings, where some object or character, innocuously introduced early on in the story, turns out to be a key to the narrative. This being the internet, calling something a Chekhov’s Gun is usually meant as a pejorative because, like, dude, I totally noticed it for what it was and wasn’t surprised by the twist ending at all. But Chekhov’s point wasn’t necessarily to conceal the importance of the gun, just that you shouldn’t be spending time on something if it’s not essential to the story. I’m betting that Chekhov would hate The Last Will and Testament of Rosalind Leigh.

The plot here is that this guy Leon inherits his estranged mother’s creepy old house, spends the night, and then leaves. Spoilers, I guess. The titular Will and Testament is mostly played in voiceover and not something that Leon directly interacts with or hears, but it seems that Rosalind Leigh liked her communications to be oblique and weird. Leon’s parents were apparently part of a religious cult that worshiped Angels, and after the father died mysteriously when Leon was just a wee lad, Leon stopped believing and eventually left the house, never looking back (hence the estrangement). Until now! Will Rosalind Leigh save Leon’s soul with her elaborate figurine collection?

More importantly, do we really care? Leon’s kinda a melancholy turd. Aaron Poole plays Leon well enough, and he looks like a sorta cross between Aaron Paul (Breaking Bad) and Rob McElhenney (It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia), which I found amusing. And this movie is an actor’s dream. It’s all in one house, and you don’t really see anyone else (there are some phone calls, off screen voices, audio cassettes, etc…), so he has to carry the movie on his shoulders. He’s given plenty to work with, but it’s all so vague that the character never really worked for me.

On the bright side, the film is absolutely gorgeous, and even when nothing is happening, the camera is always moving. I was never bored watching the movie, and I love the atmosphere this movie evokes. Amazing production design, and the cinematography is first rate. There’s a great long take towards the beginning that takes you on a sort of short tour of the house, which is quite creepily appointed with all sorts of baroque figurines and humanoid figures, amongst all sorts of other melancholy stuff. The camera lingers over everything, even as it is constantly roaming through the household. It’s as if the filmmakers are daring you to pick out the Chekhov’s guns. Will all these figurines come to life? Will the organ pipes start playing a tune?

And to be sure, many Chekhov’s Guns go off as you might expect. There’s some knitted sayings on the wall, like this ominous one: “If you drop a knife on the floor a man will knock on the door, a spoon and a woman will knock, if a fork it will be neither.” Naturally, whilst eating dinner, Leon drops his fork, which is followed by an immediate knock on the door. Spooky! We never see the person at the door, but we hear him and they have a nice conversation. Now, this was well executed, but not exactly earth shattering. Other Chekhov Guns are not nearly as successful. Another saying on the wall indicates that if the faucet is dripping, it will rain, and ZOMG, it does! A locked door with a missing key? I wonder what’s behind it? We do get to find out, but it turns out to be nothing particularly important. There’s a book called Communicating With the Dead, and Leon has a semi-relevant dream. Wow.

There’s some hokum about a wolf-like creature inhabiting the backyard and the house, and there’s a great big Angel statue that has an unsettling backstory, but nothing really comes of any of this. There’s a ton of stuff that is alluded to or foreshadowed, but those guns never go off. And, to be fair, Chekhov was a short story writer. A masterful one, but given that context, you can see why he advises keeping only essential elements in the story. So red herrings can be fine if employed in the service of a great story, and it can be commendable not to hit up the obvious horror movie tropes where the statues and suits of armor come alive and attack our hero. There’s a theme here about losing the faith, regret, and loneliness, and maybe some unreliable narration spiked with mommy issues for spice, but it never quite congeals into something that really connected with me. I will admit that I was a little surprised at the conclusion, not wholly in a bad way, but this movie at least sticks to its guns.

I can see why this movie has a following. It’s impeccably made and again, gorgeous. While I’m sure it’s a low budget film, in never feels that way, and it never goes for cheap thrills, which I can totally respect. Something this well made and mature also has to appeal to genre hounds who get sick of all the cheap, crappy horror out there. It is very ambitious and thoughtful and one could probably spend a lot of time parsing out what everything means… but on the other hand, why would you want to do that? I feel like this is a movie that could easily be cut in half (at least) and still work just as well (if not better), which is odd considering the running time is a relatively svelt 80 minutes. So it’s not a total waste of time and I appreciate slow burn movies as much as the next guy, but this did not work for me. I guess I’m coming down on Chekhov’s side here. If it’s not essential, don’t put it on screen. Alas, there’s a lot of unessential stuff in this movie.

Not much of a planned theme this week except to say that I was going to clean out my Netflix Instant queue and watch some stuff that’s been lingering on “My List” for far too long. These three are also somewhat recent films, all from the the past 5 years or so. And as it turns out, all three films were somewhat uncommon takes on the undead, whether they be ghosts or zombies. Many quibbles to be had about that sort of theme (especially given the “uncommon” nature and twists on familiar tropes of the first two of these), but hey, I’m going with it, and you should too.

• The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror V: The Shinning (sorry, no vid online)
• Shining (fake trailer)
• Session 9 (trailer)
• The Ward – Has there been a director who has fallen so far as John Carpenter? He went from genre-defining classics like Halloween and The Thing to worthless duds like Vampires and Ghosts of Mars. True, this happened over a long period of time, and Carpenter had a fantastic run in the late 70s and early 80s that only really tapered off in the mid 90s (with his last great film, In the Mouth of Madness (which is flawed, to be sure, but still wonderful). He’s been largely absent from the filmmaking scene in this current century, turning in a couple episodes of Masters of Horror (of which only one, Cigarette Burns, is worth watching) and… this 2010 movie, his first in nearly a decade. Unfortunately, it doesn’t quite feel like a Carpenter movie; it’s more like a traditional horror film that’s going through the motions, and while there’s no dramatic issues with the movie, it never quite congeals into something fantastic either. But if you’re in the mood, it will get the job done, which is normally fine, but less than what we expect from Carpenter, you know what I mean? There’s not much here that is indelibly Carpenter. Perhaps its the lack of Carpenter soundtrack, or the general cinematography, but it never quite gets that Carpenter ball rolling.

  

  The story is a typical one, set in an asylum where girls have been mysteriously disappearing. New girl Kristen (played by Amber Heard, who also played the titular character in All the Boys Love Mandy Lane from last week) quickly figures out what’s going on and tries to protect some of the other girls. In a refreshing development, the orderlies and doctors are not completely evil rapist abusers (typical of this setup), though they clearly know something that Kristen does not. There is a twist at the end of this story, something that may not make complete sense (especially given the visual treatment) and is definitely not original, but works well enough so long as you’re willing to go with it. Between the intro and the twist, though, the meat of the movie has a nice atmosphere and is reasonably well done. It leans too heavily on the “boo” moments and jump scares, while oddly eschewing a lot of opportunity for tension building. There are many sequences that could have been excellent stalk-and-kill scenes, but you get no inkling of the ghostly presence until it happens (as signified by a screech on the sountrack and a quick cut). As these things go, it’s still reasonably well executed, and I actually kinda liked the ending (the last shot, in particular, is great), but this is no classic. Worth a watch for the Carpenter faithful, and it’s fine, I guess, but perhaps Carpenter’s early success is doing him no favors now. **1/2

• The Netherbeast of Berm-Tech Industries, Inc. (short)
• Hardly Working: Slasher (short)
• Werewolf Women of the S.S. (fake trailer – extended edition)
• Pontypool – The premise sounds a bit suspect: it’s a zombie outbreak, but it’s mostly set in a radio station where three people are simply trying to make sense of what’s going on outside and broadcast that to the rest of the world. A “bottle” story certainly befits the horror genre’s low budget roots, of course, and as we find out how the infection spreads, it quickly becomes clear that this is actually the perfect setting for the story.

  

  The first act plays out as a great thriller. You’ve got no direct contact with zombies, you’re just hearing first hand and second hand accounts from folks calling in, and the producers are trying their best to piece together a coherent story. Things start to escalate in the second act, with zombies actually showing up at the station. Some of these scenes are terrifying. Just very tense stuff going on then. We start to find out what’s causing all this, and it’s a novel take on the typical zombie fare. There’s a lot of interesting discussion to be had about all of this, and the movie does a great job positing this sort of metaphorical tie to the real world without getting preachy or overly didactic. Unfortunately, I feel like the third act falters a bit. Basically, there’s not much resolution here, it just sorta ends. Oh, there’s an attempt at resolution, and I guess you could call it ambiguous, but it doesn’t quite work as well as it could. This is apparently based on a book, so I wonder if it’s more clear there than in the movie. Its origins in literature makes sense though, as a lot of the dialog feels, er, writerly (and I mean that in a good way, it’s really well done) and Stephen McHattie (typically cast as a villain, but making an excellent lead protagonist here) has a great voice and delivers it all with aplomb (Lisa Houle and Georgina Reilly also do well in supporting roles, but their dialog isn’t as meaty). Regardless, despite the ending, I think this is very much worth watching and it actually might be one of my favorites of this 6WH… Definitely worth checking out, even if you’re not a big zombie person (and for the record, I’m not). ***

• The Hitchhiker’s Guide To Murder (short)
• Shaun of the Dead (trailer)
• Slither (trailer)
• Dead Snow – This movie can be summed up in two words: Nazi zombies. What else do you need, amirite? Alright, so we’ve got a typical horror movie setup: a bunch of kids (in this case, early 20 something grad students) head to a remote cabin for partying… and death! Other tropes are hit hard too. A creepy old man shows up to drop history on our unsuspecting heroes, plenty of slasher-like stalking sequences, and so on. The setting is great, all wintery snow and visible breath, but the tone is a bit all over the place. It’s definitely got a goofy streak that I suspect would play well in a crowded theater, but watching it alone makes it seem a bit odd. Still, Nazi zombies.

  

  Some amazing gore and the all out battle towards the end is great fun. Alas, the ultimate motivation of the Nazi zombies is a bit hokey (gold!) and inconsistent (there are folks who bite it that don’t seemingly warrant Nazi zombie attention), and the ending leaves a bit to be desired (though the last shots are good). So yeah, I had fun with this, but it’s not really pretending to be anything more than a movie with Nazi zombies in it. As gimmicks go, that’s a good one, so I’d say it’s worth checking out. **1/2

So there you have it. Three films down, 171 left in the queue. So much for cleaning out my list, heh. Stay tuned for a Final Girl film club review, moar Saw movies, and some feminist discourse on horror. Lots to come.

Movie releases can be delayed for any number of reasons. The obvious explanation for the delay is if the movie is terrible, but for a surprising number of films, that’s not the case at all. For instance, sometimes a movie gets made and everyone from studio execs to the audience loves it, but it still sits on a shelf for a year or two because the distributor or studio went out of business, or the rights were sold, or something along those lines. Other times, movies get shelved because clueless studio execs want a sure thing, so movies without big name stars that aren’t remakes or sequels or blatant ripoffs of existing success get dumped. This seems to be a particularly trenchant problem when it comes to the horror genre, so let’s take a look at some of the recent shelf sitters that have been (finally) making their way to audiences:

• Thursday the 12th (Robot Chicken)
• Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (trailer)
• Halloween Rare Deleted Scene 1978 (short)
• All the Boys Love Mandy Lane – You guys, this movie was ready in 2006. It’s been 7 years! What’s more, while the film has its detractors, it’s often cited as one of the better horror movies of the past decade. It’s the directorial debut of Jonathan Levine and it’s had a pretty tortured existence, enduring studio and distributor failures (it was owned by the Weinsteins at least twice) until someone finally managed to secure a short release this Halloween season. Having heard about this movie for so long, expectations were pretty high and one thing about shelved films like this is that you really, really want to root for them.

  Fortunately, it’s a pretty good movie. It’s not perfect, and the hype derived from the extreme delay is not really warranted, but it’s a solid flick and well worth your time. It’s your typical horror movie premise: a bunch of high-schoolers take a trip to a secluded ranch to party… and die! Invited along is Mandy Lane, a strange combination of shy and popular, she’s an outsider that everyone wants to know. Or something like that. So this is your typical slasher movie setup, but things don’t quite follow the formula exactly either. Indeed, the horror elements are barely hinted at for the first third of the movie, and the body count surprisingly low until we get to the last 20 minutes or so. For instance, the “killer” is revealed pretty quickly, and it’s not your typical masked costume sort of thing that people will dress up like for Halloween (perhaps another reason for the studio waffling). This might make for some slightly weird pacing issues, but it all comes together well in the end. It’s definitely a movie that is self-aware, but not in a winking, Scream-like way. There are a few big twists on the formula as well, and it’s the ending that ties it all together. I don’t want to ruin anything so I’ll just say that it’s a very good movie. If you’re a slasher fan, you might enjoy some of the twists, but it’s also something that would appeal to non-slasher fanatics. I don’t think the lenghty stay on the shelf does it any favors, but I’m glad it’s finally available! ***

• Creepshow (trailer)
• Jack Chop (short)
• Season’s Greetings (short)
• Trick ‘r Treat – This one was ready in 2007, but “only” sat on the shelf for 2 years, garnering a series of festival showings, culminating in a craptacular direct to DVD release in 2009. It has subsequently built up a pretty solid reputation, though I really think this would have made a great movie to see in the theater (supposedly director Michael Dougherty was hoping for this to be a series that would have one entry every year, utilizing different creative teams – alas, that was not to be). I actually reviewed it during the 2009 Six Weeks of Halloween, noting that I liked it a lot even if I wasn’t sure it lived up to the hype. After a few years and a few rewatchings, I have to say that it’s a film that’s really grown on me, to the point of becoming an annual tradition. And that is the greatest thing about this: it’s a celebration of the season. They didn’t just throw some pumpkins and dead leaves in the background, they made this movie about Halloween, and every segment of the movie uses the holiday as much more than just setting or window dressing.

  

  It hits those nostalgic notes too, reminding you of Halloweens gone by and making you want to dress up and go Trick ‘r Treating. Like all anthology films, there are some segments that work better than others, but the seamless connective tissue and general excellence on display here put it far above your typical horror anthologies. So yeah, this is a fantastic movie, perfect for the season. ***1/2

• Grindhouse: Don’t (fake trailer)
• The Cabin in the Woods (trailer)
• The Strangers (trailer)
• You’re Next – And here I cheat a little, as this movie is spiraling its way out of theaters as I type. This movie was actually playing at the 2011 Fantastic Fest when I attended. I had tentatively penciled it in for its second showing, but after it premiered, Lionsgate picked it up and immediately canceled that second showing. Those that did manage to see it raved about it, and if I remember correctly, it took home the audience award at the end of the fest. Why Lionsgate sat on it for so long only to unceremoniously dump it in August is beyond me, as this is a real crowd-pleaser of a film.

  One of the things I find really interesting about this movie was how much I didn’t like the opening. After a short, promising pre-credits sequence we settle into the film proper, following various family members as they arrive at the (remote) country home for an old-fashioned family get-together. Naturally, they’re a dysfunctional family, and while there are some laughs to be had at that (Ti West plays a pretentious documentary filmmaker that’s dating one of the daughters and is pure gold), it gets really grating really fast. Luckily, someone starts shooting arrows into the house and people start dying. At first, this leads to a lot of arguments and screaming and crying and annoying but at this point, the movie turned it all around for me as we see the initially mild-mannered Erin (played by Sharni Vinson) take charge and kick some major ass.

  

  I find that a lot of movies have a great hook, a great first 20 minutes, but then peter out at the end. This movie does the opposite. The first 20 minutes or so are a bit rough, but then it just keeps getting stronger. I don’t want to ruin anything, so I’ll leave it at that, but I really had a ton of fun with this movie and judging from the Box Office, you haven’t seen it, so give it a shot when it hits video (and give it a half hour to warm up). It puts the “Fun” back in Home Invasion movies! ***

Another successful week. Stay tuned for, heck, I’m not sure what’s happening next weekend. Perhaps a long-overdue Netflix queue cleaning? Maybe a no-discernable theme week? We shall see!