Perhaps loyal Kaedrin reader Samael has too much time on his hands:
Because I have too much free time on the weekends, and because I loves me some Mario, I’m going to have a little marathon session this weekend.
The goal: Conquer the worlds of Super Mario Brothers, in order, in as little time as I can.
I’ll play through the console versions of the Super Mario games, starting with the original Super Mario Bro., and finishing with Super Mario Sunshine for Gamecube. For the sake of convenience, I’ll be using the Mario All-Stars version of the first few games, so that I don’t have to drag out my old-school NES.
I’ve set rules for myself, because I am lame. The only rules are that I can’t use any cheats or exploits, and I can’t use warp-pipes or warp whistles to skip levels. This really only effects the first few games, since it’s easy to work your way around levels in the later Mario games.
He started about 7 hours ago (he’s posting updates in my forum as he goes), and appears to still be going strong. Some highlights:
1 pm: The slot machine thing- to get free guys- is really hard to win.
It only further reinforces my general dislike of gambling.
Except for poker.
I still like poker.
I’d totally kick Bowser’s ass in a poker tourney.
3 pm: Mario looks like a doggy when he crouches with the racoon tail.
3:30 pm: World 4’s boss is named Larry, I think. His ship didn’t have any cannons on it- only the fire-spewing engines. Despite this, it had two power-up boxes. Crazy.
3:35 pm: It took me 12 seconds to defeat Larry.
That’s what he gets for being blue, and for wearing antlers on his hat.
What a tool.
Again, he’s still going. Read all about it in the forum.
Update: Anyone ever heard Mr. Bungle’s version of the Super Mario theme? Supposedly, they also do a good Tetris theme as well. I wish they’d release another album…
Update 6 pm: “I’ve crushed Bowser’s Army, his Navy, and his Air Force. What’s next King of the Koopas?
“I’m coming for you Bowser. I’m coming for you like Rambo.”