Recently in Three Floyds Category

When it rains, it pours. No sooner than I got back from my trip to Vermont, a friend got back from her trip bearing tidings of Three Floyds, so now I find myself flush with amazing hoppy beers.

There's not much out there about this beer other than its 9% ABV, 100 IBU DIPA style. Cimmerians were a real ancient people, having flourished for a few hundred years around 600 BC. It's rumored that Robert Howard claimed his most famous creation, Conan the Barbarian, was descended from Cimmerians. This certainly fits the axe weilding maniacs and woolly mammoths on the label and is typical of Three Floyds' branding, so let's crush our enemies, see them driven before us, and hear the lamentations of their women. Oh, and drink their beer:

Three Floyds Cimmerian Sabertooth Berzerker - Pours a murky orange color with a finger of off white head that sticks around a while and leaves some lacing as I drink. Smells of big citrus and dank pine, with some sort of "green" hops as well, and even a little crystal malt caramel or maybe even toffee. Taste is very sweet, with that rich toffee and caramel from the nose coming through strongly. Dank, resinous hops with just a bit of citrus character come in the middle and balance out all that sweetness in the finish. Mouthfeel is well carbonated, medium bodied, a bit sticky. Overall, it's a big DIPA with enough malt presence to put this in strong ale or maybe even barleywine territory with just a few tweaks. Regardless, I'm enjoying it greatly. B+

Beer Nerd Details: 9% ABV bottled (22 oz bomber). Drank out of a Hill Farmstead Charente glass on 8/23/14. 100 IBU. Bottled 7/25/14.

Certainly not my favorite Three Floyds DIPA, but then, they apparently have a ton of them, and you'll be seeing some more of them in the coming weeks. Stay tuned.

Let's start this review off right with a stupid meme:

So unfortunately, I'm going to have to play Rustin Cohl (i.e. McConaughey) to collective beer nerdery's Martin Hart (i.e. Harrelson). Despite all the accolades everyone seems to hand out, I did not particularly love this beer. It's not awful or anything, but it's one of those beers that's hyped to high heaven or at least, it used to be... The hype has slowly been shifting to the ever more rare barrel aged variants, though this regular, non-BA version still commands pretty high ratings and ridiculous prices in the secondary market.

For the uninitiated, Dark Lord is a massive 15% ABV, coffee-infused imperial stout made by Three Floyds in Munster, Indiana, and it's only available at the brewery on one day out of the year (aptly titled Dark Lord day). This is a practice that has spread to just about every other brewery that has a big imperial stout release (think Darkness day or Hunahpu's day). It's very much a publicity stunt, though it's also more of a festival than a beer release (though the beer is the primary motivating factor), what with lots of other beers on tap and live music and large crowds. Attendance is capped at 6000 tickets, and there are apparently huge lines (according to these guys, the wait, even when they had a ticket, was three hours) and lots of beer sharing and trading and other hijinks. Allocation is 3 bottles per ticket (for the math impaired, that's 18,000 bottles), so it's not like this is a particularly rare beer, it's just that the distribution is limited.

I got my bottle in a trade with a gentleman from Chicagoland and have been holding on to it for a rather long time. Part of the reason for this is that everyone says the beer gets better over time and that it's cloyingly sweet and boozy when it's fresh. This particular bottle was a 2012 vintage, so it's had almost 2 years to mellow out. Was it worth the wait or the hype? Not really. I certainly wouldn't mind trying a bottle of fresh stuff (or any of the BA variants (like that will ever happen)), but this definitely did not live up to expectations.

Three Floyds Dark Lord - Pours a gloopy black color with a minimum of head, barely a cap of tan head that quickly dissapates. Smells of caramel, brown sugar, a slight hint of coffee and roast. I rather liked the nose, at least at first. Taste is super sweet, sugary, some rich caramel, lots of sugar, maybe brown sugar, very sweet, not much in the way of roast or coffee, and did I mention that this was sweet? As it warms up, the coffee comes out a little more, but it feels like I'm drinking over-sweetened coffee. I don't think the age has done the coffee any favors, and it certainly doesn't stand up to the rest of the beer. Taking my cue from Rainier Wolfcastle: like the goggles, the coffee and roast do nothing. The onslaught of sugar and sweetness is unstoppable. It'd be almost admirable in its extremity if it was a little more balanced. Mouthfeel is full bodied, heavy, low but appropriate carbonation, definitely a sipper, some booze, but not overly hot or anything... The sweetness is hard to overcome if you're trying to house a bottle by yourself, so this is perhaps something you'll want to share. Overall, I can't help but be a bit disappointed. Its not bad, but its nowhere near my favorite top tier stuff. B-

Beer Nerd Details: 15% ABV bottled (22 oz. waxed bomber). Drank out of a snifter on 1/31/14. 2012 vintage, red wax.

So there you have it. I'd obviously rather be drinking this than a lot of other beer, but at the same time, it doesn't seem worth the hoop jumping that it takes to get a bottle (directly or indirectly). Back in the day, this was what I'd call a white whale beer, something I never expected to get my hands on, and with the ever shifting goalposts of beer nerdery, it seems that the regular Dark Lord has been slipping in reputation of late. As mentioned before, the barrel aged variants are a different matter, and to be sure, I could see the added complexity (and age) doing wonders for this beer (alas, I have severe doubts that I'll ever sample that stuff). Indeed, when I got towards the end, instead of powering through the last few ounces, I poured some bourbon in the remaining brew, and it actually allowed me to finish it off (this is pretty sad, really, but hey, it worked). Then I went to bed, because damn. Even spreading this out over a few hours, it was kinda tough.

In the Anglo-Russian slang of A Clockwork Orange, the word "Moloko" means milk, hence Three Floyds brewing a milk stout and slapping a Clockwork Orange-inspired label, right down to the swelled up font and the suspenders. It's my favorite of Three Floyds' labels, gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh, but as always, it's what's inside the bottle that counts.

In the book and movie, the drink is actually called a Moloko Plus, which is milk plus drugs. Alex and friends go to "milk bars" to drink up and prepare for a little ultra-violence. Sometimes Three Floyds' beer is also referred to as Moloko Plus, which is mildly disturbing, but my bottle sez nothing of this "Plus" and I didn't get anything more than a little buzzed from drinking it. As far as I'm aware, at least. So gather round, my droogs, it's time to head to the milk bar for the ol' in out (er, um, ok, maybe that metaphor doesn't exactly fit here. Heh, I said "fit". Ok, let's just drink this stuff.)

Three Floyds Moloko - Pours a deep, dark brown color, almost black, with a finger of light brown head. Smells sweet, definitely got that milk stout character down pat, light on the coffee, chocolate, and roast, but those components are there. Taste is very sweet, some coffee and chocolate, very light on the roast, lots of lactose sweetness though. Mouthfeel is very smooth, well carbonated, full bodied but not as overbearing as it could have been (not as chewy as I expected, and this is a good thing), probably the best part about this brew, actually. Really easy drinking despite the sweetness. Overall, what we've got here is an above average milk stout. B+

Beer Nerd Details: 8% ABV bottled (22 oz. bomber). Drank out of a snifter on 11/9/13.

Another solid brew from Three Floyds, and unfortunately, the last of the booty from my Chicago trade (never fear, we're planning a winter trade for some barrel aged Revolution, which is exciting).

Mikkel Borg Bjergsø, the famed Danish gypsy brewer who walks the earth, usurping excess brewing capacity at (or collaborating with) whatever brewery will have him, has also made his way through the U.S. on occasion. So what happens when he shucks and jives his way through Indiana and collaborates with one of our country's finest brewers? We get a series of barleywines exploring different grains. The first four actually seem to all be variations on the Wheatwine style, Hvedegoop being a straight up Wheatwine, with successive releases incorporating other grains such as oats, rye, and even buckwheat. All variants use the "goop" suffix, which I'll just go with because I don't really want to know why.

This latest version focuses on rice as the key differentiator. As I understand it, rice is typically a cheap adjunct used to jack up the abv while not impacting flavor at all, the sort of process you typically find in macro breweries like Bud/Miller/Coors. But when you're making a 10.4% ABV barleywine that is packed to the gills with hops, rice should help dry out the beer, keep the malts in check, and generally make it more palatable. Sounds good to me, so many thanks to Chicago trading partner Joe for sending my way. Let's see how this one fares:

Three Floyds and Mikkeller Risgoop - Pours a hazy but bright orange color with a finger of white head, very IPA looking. Speaking of which, the nose is all hops. Grassy, juicy citrus, along with some pine and sugary sweet malt aromas too. Taste has a surprising malt backbone. Nothing huge, but enough to balance out the massive hop blast that emerges in the middle and intensifies through the finish, which strikes a good balance between sweetness and bitterness. Some booze hits in the middle and finish as well, but nothing unpleasant. I don't smell or taste any rice, but I think you can probably tell that there's some sort of sugar adjunct here because of the mouthfeel, which I wouldn't call dry, per say, but which isn't as thick or gloopy as you typically would get in a barleywine (or a beer with "goop" in the name, for that matter). Medium bodied, lighter than you'd expect, but with enough booziness that it doesn't feel thin or disappointing. Overall, this is really nice, more reminiscent of a really big DIPA (or TIPA, I guess you'd call it) than a Barleywine, but that's not a real complaint at all. A-

Beer Nerd Details: 10.4% ABV bottled (22 oz. bomber). Drank out of a snifter on 2/15/13.

So yeah, FFF and Mikkeller makes for a winning combo, at least with this particular beer (I have to admit, I'm not a huge wheatwine fan, though I suspect these two brewers could give the style a run for its money). Anywho, whilst drinnking this and perusing my twitter feed, I saw that DDB posted this video and when she sez "You know it's good beer when it has a cork in it" I found myself wondering, so I performed a little experiment:

I believe she was actually correct. After that point, the beer became redolent of corking.

Another top 100 beer from Midwest ballers and abnormal label art masters, Three Floyds. Behind Zombie Dust and various barrel aged versions of Dark Lord that I'll probably never see, this DIPA is nevertheless well celebrated by beer nerds. Beer Advocate recently made some "controversial" changes to their ratings scheme, so I think this one fell down the ranks a bit, and we all know that the opinions of a bunch of strangers on the internet are usually dead on, so this is vexing. Still, being ranked 75th in the world is pretty sweet. Let's not waste any more time and get to it:

Three Floyds Dreadnaught IPA - Pours a clear golden color with a finger or two of white, fluffy head. Smells wonderful, sugary sweetness with tons of citrus and pine. Taste starts off sweet, very light crystal malt character, but then the mango and grapefruit emerge quickly and continue into the finish, along with some floral and pine notes. It finishes with a nice bracing bitterness, which is impressive considering the high ABV. As it warms, the floral notes open up and become more prominent in both the nose and taste. Mouthfeel is medium bodied, well carbonated, crisp and clean, maybe just the slightest hints of stickiness, but again, this is pretty good for such a big beer. Overall, this is a fantastic beer. A-

Beer Nerd Details: 9.5% ABV bottled (22 oz. bomber). Drank out of a tulip glass on 12/29/12.

I would put this about on par with Double Jack and Gemeni. It's maybe slightly beefier in terms of malts than Double Jack, but perhaps not quite as much as Gemeni. I don't know the hop schedule of this one, but I suspect there's some of that cascade/simcoe and centennial going on, wither perhaps a few others, which I believe puts it right in the same playing field. But I'll tell you one thing, Dreadnaught tastes a whole lot harder to get than those two. That being said, I may need to start trading with more Midwesterners, just to keep up a supply of Three Floyds stuff, which has been uniformly impressive.

Let's talk label artwork for a minute here. Three Floyds obviously employs talented artists for their labels and branding, but on the other hand, what the hell? Their main logo has a skull with batwings attached, kinda like an Ed Hardy dudebro logo. Then there's the label for Broo Doo, their fresh hop harvest ale. It features what appears to be a troll doll in a sailor's outfit, but instead of the typically furry hair, we've got a sorta hop/hair hybrid thing going on. Now, this is a little odd, but kinda par for the course in terms of beer labels. However, in the background, there's also a unicorn attempting to perform a Lucio Fulci-esque eye gouging maneuver on what appears to be a Disney princess (update: it may be Princess Peach, but the jury is still out on that one). And behind that, there's a fairy tale castle on fire with a rainbow flying over it. None of which mentions the outer portion of the label, which is all pastels, neon swishes, and stars, like something out of My Little Pony. In a bit of self-awareness, they have at least emblazoned the sides of the labels with the slogan: "It's not Normal" Well, they got that right.

I can't decide if it's the worst or most awesomest label ever, but in any case, it's what's inside the bottle that counts, so let's get to it:

Three Floyds Broo Doo Harvest Ale - Pours a clear golden (they say "apricot") color with a finger of white head. Nose is all citrus and piney, with some floral and grassy, herbal, almost spicy hop notes coming through too. The taste has a crystal malt sweetness that provides a nice platform for the various hop flavors, which tend more towards that grassy, herbal, almost spicy side than the nose, though the citrus and pine are still quite prevalent. It could just be my imagination, but it does feel like the age has subdued some of that hop character, making this more sweet than I'm guessing it is when fresh. No info on exactly what hop varieties are used, but I'm guessing Simcoe/Cascade, Centennial, and maybe some CTZ, but who knows? Mouthfeel is crisp, well carbonated, medium bodied. Not quite something I'd call quaffable, but it's still very easy to drink. Overall, another strong offering from FFF, I really like it, though I don't think there's much to differentiate it from the throngs of similar beers and it's far from the best harvest ale I've had (but then, there is the freshness factor). A tentative B+

Beer Nerd Details: 7% ABV bottled (22 oz. bomber). Drank out of a tulip glass on 12/23/12.

I've got a few more FFF beers left in the pipeline, but hoo, I'm going to want to get me some more of their stuff at some point. They are seriously pretty awesome at this whole beer thing.

This year's Christmas beer consumption here at Kaedrin has been rather eclectic. I've had some old standards, like the Anchor and Sly Fox offerings, but most of the beers I've had have fit into the elusive "do whatever you want" category of Christmas beers. It doesn't really matter what's in the beer, so much as that it has a Christmassy label. A prime example is today's beer, Three Floyds Alpha Klaus, which is billed as a "Christmas Porter", whatever that means. From their description, it's basically a straightforward porter with a big addition of "strange American hops". No idea what's strange about them, but let's find out, shall we:

Three Floyds Alpha Klaus Christmas Porter - Pours a very dark brown, almost black color with a finger of tan head and reasonable retention. Smells of typical porter toast and roast, maybe some coffee, but also a big juicy hop component that's really quite nice. Taste follows the nose. Lots of toasty, roasty malt, but it's tempered considerably by prominent citrus and pine hop flavors. Has a well matched bitterness in the finish, with both the hops and the dark malts conspiring to offset whatever sweetness that remains. Mouthfeel is medium bodied and this is eminently drinkable stuff, goes down real easy. Not too sweet, not too bitter, not too dry, just well balanced. Overall, porters just ain't my style and they tend to feel kinda samey to me, but I'm enjoying this and it actually does something interesting with the style. I can see why it's highly regarded... even if it's not my favorite beer evar or anything. B+

Beer Nerd Stats: 6% ABV bottled (22 oz. bomber) Drank out of a tulip glass on 12/15/12.

Special thanks to my new pal Joe in Chicago who slung these Three Floyds beers my way. Look for more reviews in the near future, including some Top 100 heavy hitters.

Crossed over the serpent and the rainbow to get ahold of some Zombie Dust, a single-hop American Pale ale from Three Floyds. Those Munster, Indiana brewers have quite the reputation these days, partly because of beers like this, currently sporting a 4.52 average rating (out of 5) on Beer Advocate and clocking in at number 13 on their Top Beers list. Brewed with Citra, the trendiest and thus supply constrainediest of hops these days, this was originally only available on draft, but a little over a year ago, they started bottling it. And thus it was that Indiana beer traders rejoiced at their ability to pawn off $2 bottles of beer for the veritable pick of the litter. And who can blame them? I recently acquired a few of these, along with a boatload of other Three Floyds brews (from someone who thankfully was very generous with their side of the bargain). Within hours of delivery, I was drinking Zombie Dust, and I didn't even have to take a powerful Haitian narcotic or fight sharks. Go me.

Apologies for the picture. The label is gorgeous but does not photograph well.

Three Floyds Zombie Dust - Pours a deep golden orange color with a couple fingers of tight white head, lacing out the yin yang, and nice retention. Aroma is intense grassy citrus hops, smelled it right away, as soon as I popped the cap. Really beautiful nose. The taste features a little more in the way of grassy and herbal hop notes, but that juicy citrus hop character, grapefruit and such, is the real driving force in the middle. Well balanced sweetness up front with a nice dry bitterness in the finish. Mouthfeel starts with a very well carbonated but smooth dryness flowing into that juicy, sweet middle before returning to dryness in the finish. Low medium bodied but immensely refreshing and quaffable, this thing disappeared quickly. Overall, it's superb, especially for a "simple" pale ale. Is it 14th best beer in the world? Maybe not so much, but I'll be damned if the hype on this isn't well deserved. Definitely among the top pale ales, if not the king. A-

Beer Nerd Details: 6.4% ABV bottled (12 oz.) Drank out of a tulip glass on 12/7/12.

This beer made a pretty fantastic first impression for Three Floyds, and I'm really looking forward to some of the others I've acquired, including the likes of Dreadnaught (another top 100 tick) and Dark Lord.