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    • CommentAuthorSamael
    • CommentTimeAug 16th 2006
    I should be in therapy. I swear to God.

    So, you already know all about the Hien situation. Well, another thing happened last weekend. I hung out with my friend Lisa. I became friends when I was dating Carole: aka "The One Who Got Away Because I Was A Jerk And Dumped Her In An Event Now Known As 'The Big Regret.'"

    So, she was talking to me, and telling me about what's been going on in her life, and showing me pictures, and there was a picture of Carole in there. Then she was telling me about what a jerk Carole's new boyfriend is. Not that he's a jerk, just that she's not sure about him, I guess. Apparently he doesn't really get along with Carole's friends, and he's intimidated by how smart Carole is, and by her writing (she's a writer, and a damn good one at that). So, apparently Carole is really unhappy, but it sounded like they're living together. Anyway, today, I can't stop thinking about it. Christ. I don't know what my problem is. Every time I think I'm over the Carole thing, something happens and I end up thinking about it again. I can't date someone without comparing them to her.

    Rationally, I recognize that Carole and I have been broken up for a long time, and that we're never going to be friends, let alone date, again.
    Rationally, I recognize that she's probably not nearly as awesome as I remember.

    And yet, emotionally, I keep hanging on. I mean, I shared the happiest moment of my life with this girl.

    Bah. Then I get angry at myself, and I work myself up into kind of a tizzy. Is that the word? Whatever. So, now I'm sitting at work, and I can't concentrate, because I'm both annoyed at myself for thinking about Carole, and annoyed at myself for breaking up with her in the first place, and so I'm all worked up. I feel really... eh... what's the word.... twitchy? Kind of.

    Aggitated! That's the word. I feel aggitated.

    If my life were a movie, I'd still find a way to lose the girl.
    • CommentTimeAug 16th 2006
    If your life was a movie, it might be about as confusing as Primer:P All these women you know. I've had about 2 dates in the past year, and neither went particularly well (not that they went badly either, they were just sort of bleh and lead nowhere). Where do you meet all these women? I seem to have trouble doing that. At least, meeting single women. Maybe I'm just picky, and I certainly don't have much game, but still.

    • CommentAuthorSamael
    • CommentTimeAug 16th 2006
    Oh, no. I'm sorry. I should clarify the time-lines here. Heh.

    The only girl I've dated in the last year has been A.
    I'm interested in Hien for a while, but we never dated. She tried to set me up with her friend, though.
    I dated Carole... Crap. almost 3 years ago, now. We broke up late in 2003. So, I mean, since 2002, I've only actually dated 3 girls.